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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA
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1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math.
! F) b$ h' ~! w; f- p( s0 O! Y" Y2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
: h3 Q% H8 v4 Z7 k n8 Y3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations. ; ~( D3 W/ f; l+ L. c% }. q
4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on. & I6 n' C/ u) m) y# H2 [
5. Weed - V6 W8 g- {# U9 e( c @! y
# i" O. U5 B- b& A3 [2 z- q3 f3 dTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA
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1. Big rock between you and B.C.
$ V1 y6 Z# M+ b( g' M, x2. Ottawa who?$ ?9 e7 \8 I! \1 n# _( _
3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country.
7 w: b. \" S# S, }- R0 \$ X4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of.
3 q) M# J) V: d6 P( [5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country.
) D6 n7 z! |3 K& c6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups. 5 r7 I/ F% T9 `. J% }: w
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN 7 m& k6 l" x" y$ Q; q/ W0 o
0 X) e: s! i- f+ g1. You never run out of wheat. , p' b0 W2 {2 o: H) ^! F5 Y+ G- Y
2. Your province is really easy to draw. ) q0 P1 s5 w4 [: P4 E7 e" n1 F2 f [
3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours. ; Y3 l1 ~4 x, W; B
4. People will assume you live on a farm. & k- I% C# Z! W, x3 J+ w# U
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA 9 Q9 b5 u# G& Y4 j' y6 e
& [0 u0 i* g: B# w1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property. # O4 W( C* `3 n' k/ x) j; t
2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes.
$ D0 J- o- d/ F: X3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter. 3 o1 f/ @! ^& E4 l9 H
4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood. ! X% Z: e9 T5 E. C' F4 f
5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.
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( Q2 N& \7 s' T X' {TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO
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1. You live in the centre of the universe. + {: I' i2 m7 I' t# o
2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump. 5 y! a$ d+ D. q4 W
3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election. 1 I/ R( D1 Y! E9 i+ d
4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime. # M7 Q$ J8 U/ b; h, J
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC
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* e% @0 V8 h! S+ Q% p) }. u1. Racism is socially acceptable ' }7 v( \4 b0 f: q% J% F
2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next. * N. p$ M5 z! `5 m
3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada.
! S) t- s. Y/ Q6 X0 \4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *
% t+ Q8 { h8 N; G% ?TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK , O$ w3 W, P8 ^! i' G
% j" `& R! \ |" WTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK 7 Y5 i9 X' `8 b, w5 _8 { T$ ^
. C7 }+ G" j$ v/ |& j1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income. 1 ]( I$ y2 g: t5 @3 S5 i! O2 X
2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies.
; _ I, [5 k$ K; b& Q* t3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick % u' h5 q: \. }# ~# L3 f
4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse. 1 S5 i$ {, x& u5 E# h6 u% V4 [
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9 ?0 h; h7 P+ ~+ s# _TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA - q: h* P* ~' A/ W6 I. g) K
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1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.
! _( t1 e- q/ g2 o' g7 p6 b% |9 M: S$ p2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt.
K9 o" S* R1 ]8 l1 A( y4 Z/ U3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money. ( @( e2 F. e$ w% t) D x. \
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! b) _- N; l! H$ X6 KTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND - a e4 |5 o& A7 ?
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1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge. ' y# a3 Q9 \0 [+ Q* Q9 G
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour.
7 {& S, H: q3 ?/ S. [8 E3. You can drive across the province in two minutes. 7 a, P6 U7 E( M; I. x3 X l
4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea."
0 d- h/ [: F9 u6 N5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from. * A. o* S0 W# y
6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.
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5 y. U7 c, P+ |6 ~7 |6 zTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND
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, j1 ~6 m; t* D5 }0 y! r' T6 e8 ?1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
/ q/ u( r- j# }6 X0 i5 h) |9 k7 z2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse.
: h% l' e( E/ N+ X/ v. `8 x3. The workday is about two hours long. ; p2 ^) n/ R7 _5 G! A5 ^7 I5 u# a
4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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