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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA" y. S+ E9 y: U1 c
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1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math.
2 Q. \; J( @) E! e2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
( b Z4 D8 x" H3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations. " Y( v C2 B7 D5 i
4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on.
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6 h$ `% v/ m9 k1 O6 L) Y4 e# STOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA 5 `- A- z* P" d/ Z- @7 _* c+ ]. d& D
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1. Big rock between you and B.C. & L; u; ]8 r8 k1 Z+ T! o
2. Ottawa who?
" z3 S. O% w* o, ]3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country. - G9 h2 t, e& d* N
4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of.
5 ]- n% L a. E5 m5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country. , e% b( D5 D# n" D2 \# ]8 ?: @( }! _; ]; i
6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups. L- V' H/ }8 y/ ^
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6 y; D# M+ [3 K$ ]0 _0 lTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN
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1. You never run out of wheat.
, [+ o. Z1 B& D- ~2. Your province is really easy to draw.
* p& M- K9 N1 E3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.
, S4 n$ D7 ] A7 T- x, s% w4. People will assume you live on a farm. % p6 A$ j8 w6 R, |! g9 c- g( t
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA ' ~0 x5 L! {# n
* P6 L3 H5 R( T5 U" w) ~$ P# v1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property. ) k/ d& } H! n) u5 a) y8 S
2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes. 3 W: p# `1 k6 I- r
3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter. ! N8 {& D9 I; g- j3 ~" C
4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood.
$ B# V* {* Z% h3 ^3 {! W4 `; z5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO : U) C$ O7 \) D8 h1 E- Q7 H
8 V: K4 S7 @$ _) E" Q8 J2 y1. You live in the centre of the universe.
( N9 a5 Z* }. }. h! w0 C2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump. * [4 P( p d/ R. @
3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election. . z0 n# v( i" H/ ~) `( s
4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime. 7 G: F% `6 z b8 v$ u. V
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- ]% T1 M: o, j- u. oTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC
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1. Racism is socially acceptable
. c1 i# x: d# i! t# j! H2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next.
9 W- @7 N4 u+ y) z: Y9 D3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada.
6 O# I6 }/ U& U; `1 J4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *4 S+ k; M+ d" Y! @. u, i3 S) X" r
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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6 d" y0 z1 ^! C; [. ^TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK 3 o% n) t5 ]- z1 e8 J, A% M$ I
9 M7 e3 _ w( a8 P) g: a1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income. 4 m4 E; f9 G( E6 \2 v, U: ?7 Z: c
2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies. % U3 X! M, q a5 \0 v; ~6 i; f* u
3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick
4 R$ \9 H( @5 a, r( _ Q! f1 t4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA + z" q5 o6 j" a5 O
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0 c g1 z5 q; k/ R1 P2 u$ q' }1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.
. I4 ?( [, ~7 k7 y" N3 x% ^3 }2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt. . ~ ?+ H! M6 {* e x
3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money. 9 k5 q* A- F( m
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
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: O& P5 W' b8 f! D1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge. - k( C2 A" ?( J Q0 j8 Q) S2 D
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour.
9 J( D6 N$ s5 j% ?, A( g4 j: h: f8 O3. You can drive across the province in two minutes. + C t5 A) h# D2 |
4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea." " S9 c' ^& y' c5 o" J4 i5 T
5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from. $ a7 T- l+ ~: n, ]$ r6 r$ Q. A
6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.
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* {* h) y0 q* g& v: I) `TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND
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1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
" Q9 q, O7 c$ Z; }2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse.
5 B( Q# W/ W2 [, I& d3. The workday is about two hours long.
- B$ j* Y' A5 {4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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