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Tiger s Holiday Poem
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Twas the night of Thanksgiving and out of the house
9 y9 b6 V! _0 e0 H- m: F h! TTiger Woods came a flyin', chased by his spouse.. v" J* m2 m9 Q' e
She wielded a nine iron and wasn't too merry,# T: l0 z, H9 F6 Q
Cause a bimbo’s phone number was in his Blackberry.
- f4 G, k. B. H4 ~0 m, M# ~4 SHe’d been cheatin' on Elin, and the story progressed.1 O3 e& U, G, h4 C7 l& A& @. b
Woman after woman stepped up and confessed.
V2 M& q/ J/ BHe’d been cheatin’ with Holly, and Jaimee, and Cori,5 i9 y3 H$ O6 Q
With Joselyn, and Kalika. The world had the story.: n( l2 [* N0 p! B& Z
From the top of the Tour to the basement of blues,
/ ]: T4 I7 @/ GTiger’s sad sordid tale was all over the news.! X7 ]$ b6 b! }2 Q! S) p
With hostesses, waitresses, he had lots of sex,
! r) t9 H" p- vWhen not in their pants, he was sendin' them texts.& I5 ~" D9 L/ N1 P
Despite all his cryin’ and beggin' and pleadin',
o5 O* o, m7 |( V' xTiger’s wife went investin' -- a new home in Sweden .4 u, O' [, w, R; }8 }: X
And I heard her exclaim from her white Escalade,3 R |5 v$ n( v' d& T. ]
"If you’re gettin' laid then I’m gettin' paid."
( e- `/ }7 N# F; IShe’s not pouting, in fact, she is of jolly good cheer,
& _/ g% {; H% P o# X/ THer prenup made Christmas come early this year. |
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