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Tiger s Holiday Poem3 |8 P! }# u$ O- ^
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Twas the night of Thanksgiving and out of the house6 _, @( U' x& `, o o
Tiger Woods came a flyin', chased by his spouse.
2 i+ r1 @6 e; x V# K; QShe wielded a nine iron and wasn't too merry,, Q5 n K: A6 X* p5 T
Cause a bimbo’s phone number was in his Blackberry.
+ R# F8 q7 o1 N, Q( ~He’d been cheatin' on Elin, and the story progressed.
8 ?0 w& X) E3 T# z6 wWoman after woman stepped up and confessed.
5 d1 a6 n& t9 F1 aHe’d been cheatin’ with Holly, and Jaimee, and Cori,
" p( K" T& ?1 [, J, I" hWith Joselyn, and Kalika. The world had the story.
- j2 E+ h# X' yFrom the top of the Tour to the basement of blues,8 \: ]% I$ v0 w
Tiger’s sad sordid tale was all over the news." W! D( j, ^& d5 ~) F6 b# O4 j) r
With hostesses, waitresses, he had lots of sex,& q% G2 g2 ^7 w9 R
When not in their pants, he was sendin' them texts.' A) t8 _& A# r8 e4 a
Despite all his cryin’ and beggin' and pleadin',' R# l" c( M" s- Y
Tiger’s wife went investin' -- a new home in Sweden .
3 E' J+ i, g; G3 pAnd I heard her exclaim from her white Escalade,6 C0 {0 ?) X3 I! _* {8 n. O
"If you’re gettin' laid then I’m gettin' paid."
" q3 i- Z) ` G/ C, B7 qShe’s not pouting, in fact, she is of jolly good cheer,
8 w# X+ A# |, j. H, F1 eHer prenup made Christmas come early this year. |
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