 鲜花( 1)  鸡蛋( 0)
|
THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:' o; I. d3 g2 \. C$ i; x
' f) P Q- I: |6 }9 X% r1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
# ], {- S: n- N0 T' l
) | V7 d0 {4 M& P2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
* G/ f! ^' m" R" p% z1 r, W. J) t% phour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
% v3 \, S2 r, a" h! ^morning.
) R" K: J! v+ K- W" u. j f
& y h' l/ z+ ~8 ~( a3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,8 O2 D/ ]" s, _1 l
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a" a$ H. i4 |1 s
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
) v3 e4 t8 g9 |" z
6 y9 {. |6 w% b/ j4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its! o+ J1 y0 N: ^
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest4 d Y- y% |$ D8 M" z. Z' Q
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
* @( e! k; D- k4 w% w) L& v: ?go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
- V5 T7 F6 N9 J; Xphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way./ R7 R u% U' @4 s9 B
/ S4 I- \+ G4 j- q2 E
5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
* h3 E3 u6 ~6 ~9 S7 X5 @9 \0 vcussed out, and possibly shot., i" O+ @" t7 c' @" e3 R" L
2 ]) T' [ P- `& d- t6 _6 ]6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
5 {7 x, H0 K1 j% T, Y- ^get you shot.( B/ A8 Q1 ^0 x* I6 P% W2 E
8 |! ^8 Z$ o$ N, w+ ^
7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
7 [0 V& u; D8 R. N, _has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at8 U7 [% D/ y9 [6 F' k5 z$ A; t
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
" [) ~ N6 T! J$ u. L4 ayou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first/ l2 q, U/ R7 b6 w' k1 H' Z' _+ x) F
vehicle through the intersection.% M1 x% T7 b2 l( \
. l* q/ m- z' U8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour# U8 B" x% K% v/ i; h- o
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
' r7 t X, Y1 Y: Sday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and: x) o( z# G# K
more construction starts everyday.
7 y" N3 _4 V+ A" m3 r; k/ }0 L5 c4 ~4 A
9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,$ \8 n, }& `/ V# Y0 u+ J
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
1 R. B) }! m1 [+ Isquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items./ u( N- F: b" i8 D2 P# E, Y% I
7 y$ C* m- I0 t1 H9 d" {6 v3 G# z10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same) W1 N: z) C+ E2 n
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
1 q6 w9 H* O; g) J& Z% E) ^Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
% K; g7 c7 c2 x n+ Y) x/ p2 t66 Street are also the same road; got it?
+ S6 D( P- O8 k9 h* a! j- g! _$ h
11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
& B& F7 g7 p2 k7 q2 Vshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally F5 p9 U/ ^& a, s0 J
Activated.'$ I3 |8 `7 G, B. x8 @
* R* A) K2 n$ c" C4 v% |
12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,) i6 [0 A$ _ R# u% p$ E
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
& E/ ?( ]7 ~8 e7 N1 jaccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.# Q; |! G' `) c/ c% `
4 I: T/ C V0 g F
13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur+ y9 t; ~4 s, n8 n
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and2 i, g+ r1 y/ T% Z/ B
blankets in the vehicle. |
|