 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
9 \$ c0 U5 S) l请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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4 Z9 J3 [1 b- ^: u. r$ O1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.. G. e0 Y; [! N$ s
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫% h7 F9 h' J2 M, D4 h
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it) F0 G9 X4 g e: l
down./ e" k9 B9 k7 Z
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about ' L8 \7 Y- w) {. b3 B$ j& h% n
you. }6 o. R. D* s! J
leaving it down.
- n+ ?7 c1 W. [% h2 G0 y( R1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？5 ]1 C) g& T& s; u1 i
% G# q" ^8 \) i' a1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
% s. E7 Q2 G' H3 K. QLet it be.
) r. y5 u" M/ a$ R9 A0 {( g% C1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去6 x( q; C* [4 `6 @" v
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it* z9 F$ E, {, n# b# G3 A- H
that way.
/ Q, x I+ g. T/ z" q1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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1. Crying is blackmail.
. g/ h. Q$ ?- K1，哭泣是敲诈8 V) c8 z. K# u2 T* S
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1. Ask for what you want.
. N2 }! _& V( J) T$ M: d1 C0 ~- ?Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!% q! E; a7 [- @) g" k
Strong hints do not work!
+ Y; d: w h3 L: xObvious hints do not work!
. R" B/ m, E$ U, BJust say it!0 j1 [3 L6 ~. A: L3 @. {; e* p
1，你想要什么就说
8 c9 m2 M, a) i- U. \! P我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！- w5 ~: g) E1 @% `" n
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
6 r/ a- W+ N( d0 Hquestion.
$ i: }" |% W0 S; }9 C2 U" @* C1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
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0 e" n/ O8 K! u, z% }7 M8 D1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
! c& {6 u/ B. R, cwhat we do.
1 n" k$ }2 q5 fSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.+ B8 y, X* q, C: U, u
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。 B! `8 b% ]6 X& V4 d( E- ?( I
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
% y* e6 N, a. c- Q) q5 W2 n$ S% n$ J1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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. E& t5 W+ f) V1 o7 x! V1 _1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
, T9 ^( [. t9 a; _5 ^5 WIn fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.* h* W( n- }2 ^* E" c
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
+ f# K5 p+ c- F2 }) B2 `to act like soap opera guys.$ z6 h8 g. [1 O# ^' P! C' q
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们3 O" Q% Z( S+ L( a' [* ~0 ~
7 q# p& R6 A) `5 k, e0 C5 G/ R1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us., a [ O4 {! G5 y( f7 c4 m
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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) K4 _, ?+ t7 C2 v1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways8 t1 P! e. J) X2 t. s
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
* H9 O8 q6 a3 I; O* {! ?6 N" L4 y1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。/ G& p2 \$ {/ W
/ J' D4 D# _ F! E- w（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）
& m7 b7 B# O4 \, W3 n1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
[1 ]3 Y- T- x' J4 t' Xdone. Not both.
$ o4 g& i9 J' o1 u& xIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.1 O) w4 s: O% m0 C! p6 X) l
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
, s9 i' y. w% }, u' Qcommercials.
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3 i- G* u+ C9 ^1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.# i6 l7 Y X& z; ?0 i. M! o
, j4 D, h/ I$ q1 |% g. r1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
0 M% {) _$ }1 `( `4 d! fPeach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
# C T" _! j; VWe have no idea what mauve is.5 c# [: L1 v, z1 d& x& e
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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! W+ ?% M. z6 \3 S4 ~' F2 u1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
" @1 C6 {1 m" @$ o, K$ b ^$ i) y/ `$ Mnothing's wrong.: q; G3 C, f1 ]5 O( q+ ^6 E( b
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.: V3 f. t& `/ Z+ z6 x
' K& j0 V& q/ F8 L6 o3 v1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer* q7 j( _2 J: n( ^) q
you don't want to hear.
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$ Z2 T6 Y" e' ~% A8 H [1 S/ L1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
9 T* `- H/ X- D. q0 ^fine...Really.) g" b" t$ y( M$ g$ O @& {: `! p
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
3 U% U3 p% z* L1 U: idiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.- a& Z/ j& {$ z# S
8 ~+ d1 Z3 a8 H1 G& I5 u: o7 n1. You have enough clothes.
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1. You have too many shoes.2 C- K2 p2 K3 n* P7 c9 m0 ]( X
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!1 \2 f; L9 [$ n2 T$ E4 o6 B
2 |: y* b W; n6 X3 |; H% l) {& o1. Thank you for reading this.2 R" p. a' D3 P" G! G
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
. c d$ }8 L* t& |But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.$ P7 z$ g: \ {( ?4 P$ }
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
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