 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!7 H, N" i( {# ]7 m( m
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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' A: b2 ?9 Y/ G* N" X1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
& Q+ v$ b, [$ A+ a; R& Y1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫# Y4 f) n1 _' z, f8 ?/ H- N
1 u9 ?0 R3 S, ^ M Q0 n1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it _9 ?0 ?" C4 W/ h
down.4 a# R: Z# B6 k# c
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about 2 ]; o2 o* s5 q" J* Q; j
you' B( N# |4 L$ N* k8 H
leaving it down.5 |9 d! \# D- K/ @4 |8 {
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？! r( k6 k: A/ g
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
6 T9 c m6 u" T; N/ [4 h' U3 p& D( sLet it be.' _3 J7 k6 q2 y% }
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去 \. r8 u ~; H: x% r" ^
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it: s8 ^ x1 f. x$ B% K8 O5 @
that way.- Q% z$ D. G- ~! [ d/ V
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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5 l" ]. T P" |8 X9 r9 O: m1. Crying is blackmail.- {. L# K3 K' m- ?0 e8 Z2 D
1，哭泣是敲诈2 E0 m! M, g4 T
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1. Ask for what you want.
3 i' w: m5 l4 r0 G$ [* v/ a8 QLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
+ Q! R% w. P, S/ k, Q4 M- F! iStrong hints do not work!7 |6 x0 B! J, h) @7 a/ C
Obvious hints do not work!# k Y! L. K* {$ A5 B
Just say it!
5 t. C6 F/ Y4 q- a, N' k9 w1，你想要什么就说" Z# h' A3 m3 ~' {, I; P, `
我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！' q0 Q+ Z$ k) k& k0 A( ?; s
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
* B1 f. M7 M3 zquestion.
! q% Z# |4 {" o& T/ t: j1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
. O& {* ^6 y H0 N2 [3 Uwhat we do.
# f) o' D# m2 a% D' eSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.& Z+ D0 \! _" N$ [8 S. D
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。/ R0 k1 d R2 H6 m1 Q2 w% j3 I
( }# I8 t) Z$ S' p, c4 @( ~+ R# O1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.+ ~5 L- h1 ~; r* }" Z) o x/ o7 @* A
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.: u" |+ B# c! C1 b
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
: t& M- L9 o- n2 Q. S) t我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了! k: }4 [/ h' A+ t! I% e
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us, u6 j1 }8 t: F* e
to act like soap opera guys.
( h. ]+ L. }' b1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们3 y k) C4 {. i/ E
1 H8 G! _! F* q! c& w1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
6 B' M- j9 P- e+ p* v @7 @1 ]1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways% w- R# ]7 z% {% [. J1 }1 C
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.4 S2 n7 Y# _$ V; z) e
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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: q* e( ^: N" Y, x（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）
! @: [3 K! `& [1 q4 j& ?1 G* Q! S( D1 y1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
1 N% K) y) a6 K% b0 a: gdone. Not both.- M! ?' P7 h& X4 l, w
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.+ G4 c e7 o6 N+ `
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
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2 d2 q3 K& a( n) \, G1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
) Y. E0 g; ~, GPeach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
L: M7 e; t8 M4 b) j& ? qWe have no idea what mauve is.) `$ c ]' x, W5 w5 ]+ \. K
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.0 y N) c' _" e2 L" E# Q
/ x2 u1 G9 z+ a: B6 r$ V" M3 z1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
% e: [. ~" \1 P. p2 Wnothing's wrong.0 O: w8 T5 x! S. q" b
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.# D, J! r. p+ O2 T8 Z2 A2 c
) b8 |) a( ~- Z# Q# e; d1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
" l6 V ^- R1 G& kyou don't want to hear.9 H% K! A" j5 }; W7 s$ D$ m
U L2 z3 m8 z- X3 e1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
# D2 I1 H; a: v% [' nfine...Really.
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to Z+ ~6 g0 l' z0 J! m; R$ S2 H
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.2 y7 E+ ~: B1 y5 _: }! e
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1. You have enough clothes.! }1 x# `2 p$ z" {) D$ [8 ~* V
| p5 p! A1 P0 d1. You have too many shoes.
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0 {& e' }/ I7 x1 x8 S) C: [1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
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# T' d; A1 @/ h# V; q+ w8 I1. Thank you for reading this.- G8 ?, _( m S& S
. f1 w' u" f5 v; v2 LYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
8 S1 I7 K: J- s- G8 IBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.' w0 n" g$ `) w/ o4 N0 V7 G1 Z
/ }1 W& E+ G9 W% VPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
' z n' ?. z3 q% `$ p* f: }9 wPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
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发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
