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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA' e3 @, B! x7 O0 [4 f6 O
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1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math. 3 Y+ h8 p V- A4 ^/ y+ R6 l& a; R
2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
7 l0 u) ~! Y& K- i5 `3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations.
/ X" L3 m8 w U# q* R4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on.
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1 X( T/ o" H& MTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA S9 m/ U" F. W) E. E: W6 U
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1. Big rock between you and B.C.
9 M9 F# G i) v+ }2. Ottawa who?
7 T! b. A3 l* Q4 |3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country. 0 c! J Y# Z$ t6 ~* c3 u
4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of.
8 J- x6 [5 v7 Q3 Q- [! ^ {5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country. E; n% O% W1 g4 S) e5 ]2 Y7 [
6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN - C1 B {" Q* ]1 M' x
9 r' h4 |# a# e% h1. You never run out of wheat.
& u$ g& R$ ]' t) I, m( q' p) k2. Your province is really easy to draw.
: l& k9 n/ K5 C8 b- [- H3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours. 0 d$ y+ k+ q; S$ c3 b1 f, e {: \
4. People will assume you live on a farm.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA
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1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property. / v+ m+ J& n' L
2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes. 9 s+ p7 ]% L! L8 I9 ^
3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter. 5 S; U$ ?0 L3 X% u0 z- ~
4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood. 2 J/ {7 M- ^' C3 G# K8 ~; W
5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by. " P$ n+ W5 O" D9 ~: c9 p% D
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2 O$ J7 k' g3 I8 T, P# d: P7 QTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO $ `4 i1 _' D# B
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1. You live in the centre of the universe.
' G% c! O* c% i% O2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.
' u% A- c, ]9 h% \& c+ l9 }2 H3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.
; i3 S) y" j3 p# m+ I4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime. ]" _4 Y, q1 f# G* W3 s, m5 q9 x
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; Y2 t. a1 B% y. j: @' ?TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC
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1. Racism is socially acceptable
7 _1 u( t* X! ~3 ~2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next.
9 C7 v5 t' ~8 w/ K C: B1 ~3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada. 7 |( d$ t G- v* _" i9 ]
4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *
* w' Z2 \% z$ t' S0 r/ zTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK j% H& }" s2 G+ v. o
2 ?+ v7 N V4 h% ?1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income.
5 X; Y: ~& U- W# } [3 u# }2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies. " b9 w7 ~+ N8 y! O" L6 r
3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick + }" ^) B% {- x* Q1 |
4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse.
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' G1 {6 s( u. dTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA
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7 J+ E" C2 ?' |+ |! H1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.
9 {: O' B7 H" L0 M2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt. 6 _9 z; Z* s* u- d7 z( R
3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money.
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% y: F# J$ m* x, _) [# n% pTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
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1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge.
, S5 g$ M5 J* F: f6 C2. You can walk across the province in half an hour. " o1 U9 }& u! G6 @' d+ L
3. You can drive across the province in two minutes. " m. ~, D- y; h+ d
4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea." + b/ }2 ?6 k) b- s% ?
5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from.
- w& B+ ^( K$ Y9 a3 Y# l$ A3 @6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND
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1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea. * {/ P) o6 g* q, N4 m0 _ W2 ? K. i
2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse. 2 v) I, v0 i! E7 V# q$ K& N
3. The workday is about two hours long.
- y4 m/ x. n+ u) j+ ]; S4 m4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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