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送给要来或者打算要来EDMONTON,ALBERTA的朋友

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发表于 2007-10-11 19:09 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
NEW RULES FOR ENTERING ALBERTA
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" n9 M' p% l# e8 \ 1. Bring your own house.
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2. If going to the Oil Sands, bring your own house, school and! u! D' w% H7 {. b) M$ E- u
hospital., K3 K8 Y; ]5 R3 l' h

5 v" S3 d+ X' d3 q! J 3. If going to Edmonton , wear your flak jacket. This is the murder
. [' f' w$ m: S% z* Ccapital of Canada .
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1 r- }1 S" |. V5 B2 s& W# p 4. If driving to Edmonton, it is also the auto theft center of Canada .+ e9 Z- K8 u) I8 D

- q1 d0 k6 K' X( R% b 5. If you are bringing drugs, head to West Edmonton Mall, the drug
/ y: n. X, b5 }3 x- Kcapital of Canada .! S6 l  g# s  P- ~' R* S6 ]

, m, u8 S/ C; M* } 6. If you are looking for work, look no further. Minimum wage is
* F; U9 [8 q& q# _* B  D0 q$8.00/hour.
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, e8 g% z- {' [- j' r* j9 B 7. If you work downtown, parking costs $10.00/hour.4 Z7 y3 ~6 C; z6 p
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8. If you are able to buy a house in Calgary , why not spend the money6 B5 ]3 l6 j3 A3 ]1 t
on a 15 year holiday ?) h, Z) X' p' Y7 g
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9. If you drive a Hummer, look out. We sit amongst the highest gas8 v5 z) e. Y7 \- J# b
prices in Canada . (So much for The Alberta Advantage)# Q1 t- n7 |( }: r
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10. In Edmonton we have 5 hospitals. 10 years ago we had 7. Don't come
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11. In Calgary, the population has exploded. The last road was paved 128 Z5 {9 `2 x0 M( I
years ago. Calgary is a no-parking zone.
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% K% H: {2 {" p0 h$ B THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON :  ^( T# r  O4 f4 _) E, Y
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: " E-MIN-TIN ".& A. ~/ U- Y' c6 [
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00am to noon. The evening rush hour
9 {' n) h, i, @+ o, v3 gis from noon to 8:00pm. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday morning.
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3 . Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its& o& c: v) B8 z8 J- g; z
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest* E+ H1 f' b( t. d
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires$ [0 m& s/ E  p/ }1 d. @
go second. However, south-west Edmonton , SUV-driving, cell
: E/ L/ H$ O+ R6 b5 Q: H# wphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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4 . If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
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5 . Never honk at anyone. Ever! Seriously! It's another offense that% `' b7 W9 W4 n2 P1 N' |
can get you shot.- I* m) F% Z- o* ~, z+ J( I+ H, ^5 _. A

, {& V" w, C% U* H. j  F6 . Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton . Detour
" y5 @8 B2 `4 i1 u" p4 dbarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
/ t& T' a" ~1 u+ N2 X+ l: b3 @day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
( Z* K" L% [2 K5 L" Y2 ?more construction starts everyday.( F: y; }* q5 @' y+ P1 j
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  7 . Watch carefully for road hazards such as drunks, skunks, dogs, cats," g2 A2 }" e9 n, B5 E/ v
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
- F. d& {' a& ~% w" P% n( \squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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8 . Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are all
! Q) X2 i+ Q, x( |; |9 e, Jthe same road.
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4 ^8 _2 y  Z4 q3 t" z+ r/ N! U5 d9 . If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the; M; {4 J! _0 U) B) n* K3 B
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been "accidentally/ ^/ O2 j9 l& c* B$ ~0 l% B1 v. f
activated."
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10 . If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km+ j$ k1 s7 J- Q  t* k
zone, you are considered a road hazard and will be "flipped off"5 I6 `9 [# w% _
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.! Z0 h& d3 D1 P

& G1 O7 _; ~( u- N4 S* X0 R) v11     . For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
5 n7 B+ L: \0 C4 j* }& ^( Vlined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
  V7 i$ `( n1 T( Z3 S/ h+ R# dblankets in the vehicle, as snow removal from the city streets is
* }+ Z0 ^1 }% d* V/ h/ _virtually non-existent until the spring thaw.
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:19 | 显示全部楼层
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有点夸张。不过还是佩服生活在这的人,大部分人都活下来了。
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:26 | 显示全部楼层
又是一个挨砖的帖子。
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:28 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:51 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2007-10-11 19:53 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2007-10-11 20:32 | 显示全部楼层

公厕

老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。7 w  S1 I  ?# o$ u
满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。( ]3 r8 E1 n6 J/ M7 k
有一个人,他骂了自己所在单位一辈子,由于长期持有一种心情,一种哀怨的表情,脸色都是土灰色的了,可就是没见他作出什么成就,已没有离开他的破单位,却大大煞了周围人生活的风景。
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:05 | 显示全部楼层

ZT: The same joke

来自多伦多的朋友 忽悠 其他朋友 来爱民屯说 :
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此地钱多, 人傻, 速来 . q% R2 ]/ p' u% i
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( v) e! h  ]/ x! l" K[ 本帖最后由 April 于 2007-10-11 22:12 编辑 ]
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:20 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 HOAH 于 2007-10-11 21:32 发表
" F# r3 c" |7 `1 I& t. u朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。
' @; i) }2 g6 k8 E+ f满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。) \/ W5 f; t5 ~; F
...
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7 p, r4 M- p' r2 t. [! z" R9 ? 说事,谈话题,别攻击人。什么素质?整个一厕所。
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:23 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
是原创吗?楼主太有才了,佩服啊!!
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:26 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2007-10-11 21:34 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 pacibridge 于 2007-10-11 22:20 发表 & o* U: K5 \0 g, y, X

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+ R  m1 y# O: @; F$ x2 @; O 说事,谈话题,别攻击人。什么素质?整个一厕所。

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这么刺痛你了吗?2 `" T9 {& z* G6 P5 p2 l, Z

" F4 N- k! \0 V' [$ Q( k我可指的是极少数人,如果你不是,就别往自己身上想。
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发表于 2007-10-11 23:23 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 HOAH 于 2007-10-11 21:32 发表 ; q  i" o6 w2 }
朋友坐在一起聊天的时候,最怕有人带来公厕的味道,弄得大家好好的生活都觉得恶心。
5 C5 O+ h2 _6 F6 |7 w: L) _满腹牢骚的人看似独树一帜,其实大多数都一生一无所成,能混个平常日子都不错了。因为他们把自己看得太高了,什么都屈才。
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  ~2 r1 B, ~8 O. {你这样不太好吧!每个人都有抱怨的权力。对待不合理的现象大家都齐声颂扬,好象不是民主自由的加拿大的特点。
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+ N6 n# i7 Y, M) d再次申明我的观点,Edmonton是全世界最好的城市。
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发表于 2007-10-12 06:53 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
埃德蒙顿, 是一个盛产冠军的城市! 能在埃德蒙顿扎根发展的人, 都是强者中的强者!
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发表于 2007-10-12 07:30 | 显示全部楼层

可能 你真的不知道 埃德蒙顿 同样 藏龙卧虎

Please mark ZT when 分享 other people's 原创. Thanks.
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发表于 2007-10-12 09:35 | 显示全部楼层
就是一还“有点才”的调侃嘛。有些人干吗那么serious啊
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发表于 2007-10-12 14:34 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
以前见过,这好像是西门莎菲大学的人写的(不敢肯定).不光EDMONTON,还有别的省,市.只是调侃.
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