HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN/MAN

老杨

HOW  TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN  :  
. t0 I4 q* K2 D* o( P

+ B. e4 Y2 ^4 ^  Q--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

* G; [* D( ^) I# a- ^# P
7 S9 i( F0 H1 G! E$ \4 y+ Z) J) W            
9 A  f+ d* e, j3 P/ Y9 `Take off  clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to  lights and darks.

Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing  gown.
1 y) J( v" f& \1 T0 E' W7 m) }0 T
( l, E% N; p0 ZIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed  areas.
  ?1 z) |2 r, ~% ?. D) Y4 U
% d. s6 ^; [6 x- A; _9 L( {Look at your womanly physique in the mirror --  
+ J: y. O& y# c0 n0 O1 ]6 G0 Mmake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.

Get  in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah,  wide loofah and pumice stone.

Wash your hair once with  cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
2 y- Y. w$ G- r- ]% n
Wash your  hair again to make sure it's clean.
. C5 F3 L' m# T/ s% v4 b
) T  Z0 N6 g( x2 ]6 B. HCondition your hair with  grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..

Wash your face with  crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.

: S: |. L2 u: I3 o& S/ I; VWash  entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.  
) A' `: b" J+ x" N8 R
) a- S9 }9 q; r6 t% ?5 _' pRinse conditioner off hair.
. P  b# T* O2 t7 x/ I: w
Shave armpits and  legs.

8 v9 D' m& l3 B* N9 oTurn off shower.

Squeegee off all wet surfaces  in shower.
+ q. p/ }* q3 s+ k  w8 l% R9 ~
Spray mold spots with Tilex.
" O# T0 d/ |0 L% P8 j. r( ?
; Y! r& [) ~  l5 N2 SGet out  of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small  country.  
7 F( }) t3 H# R/ n) K+ A
Wrap  hair in super absorbent towel.  

$ ]4 ?! R) q2 }Return  to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.  

If you  see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.  

7 X" {$ l3 G, D
  z5 i# D& D8 x$ tHOW TO  SHOWER LIKE A MAN:  
. Z1 k# ^- N5 }- ]8 d/ n: N
( [/ j" N7 v* ?0 D# C( qTake off  clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a  pile.  

$ a7 f9 z9 Z: Y/ W5 z0 W4 XWalk  naked to the bathroom.
( K5 t, j4 H1 C0 M4 k1 g$ I
If you  see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo  sound.  
. D( R% p1 @9 [9 ?8 z
Look at  your manly physique in the mirror.
" C- n7 \; \7 A; g  A
# F: q, A4 O- n- p! d3 z$ FAdmire  the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.  
8 F% P& |& ]2 s' s+ K0 f
5 r4 _3 `. }% U- p& F. \# k9 eGet in  the shower.  Wash  your face.Wash your armpits.  
' E& y, O1 ~4 b7 n8 l
Blow  your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.  

Fart and  laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
; `/ V1 L6 J( `% M# I# X: I  q
Spend  majority of time washing privates and surrounding  area.  

Wash  your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the  soap.  
& c' a" F& G* A* V7 j; i% D
Wash  your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.  
5 X5 j5 q6 \9 [& x& d
3 F) n5 [" G' ^& o5 H2 b5 _4 OPee.  
4 S/ g& }: Z3 a
Rinse  off and get out of shower.

Partially  dry off.
9 _6 D$ Y9 p. j5 l% F8 R
# F0 p9 K6 ~" `, G% x( \9 ~Fail to  notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the  whole time.
8 |  e/ S9 c& ]
' ]9 H& v7 ^, bAdmire  wiener size in mirror again.  
9 L& p; ^/ N9 d0 Q% r
Leave  shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan  on.  
- K( X2 |) _2 K) t! F2 y2 E
Return  to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off  towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.  

Throw  wet towel on bed.
7 m" d+ f: ^  F2 G. \1 c' G
If there  is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this,  there is something SO very wrong with you.

partybreaker

Funny~

9527

啊，老杨，你是这么洗澡的吗？晕

Elaine.MYL

lmao...

Eunice.kk

冬日繁星

vivid! man and woman are always so different.