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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe., O$ q5 d* D7 q$ U
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.1 O5 W9 O8 p; Z2 N

' P9 ~, u! Z+ h& e9 g) V$ YI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years., }' s6 B) r" [
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:" Y% R& _( b; L5 B
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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: }% g8 N- r' _1 b$ N. BAnd the second one was:+ g( |* ^2 S  W4 ~! X; ~0 N

3 m/ p; \' W) H, A3 g% Y2 s" F"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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" G) x9 s+ l  }+ N& Y0 fI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?") w3 i# Y% T6 G1 p0 z
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?1 l* m  @  k4 A' W0 t. s( ~! K1 i

8 i2 p- q1 X6 i4 X9 z: G/ @7 s  mI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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0 K8 U1 G' j1 j. ?So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"1 @  C- D) y8 h3 A, N' x9 j, h. M

- Y# t% i5 B: XNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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% w7 K8 f7 z, z+ o2 n4 XThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.$ w4 r8 S/ k: \, m

" a* i4 d: e+ t/ {1 M# UThank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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0 \* a  }+ e* m3 R, |1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.% Y. B  o& f& r6 {

& J7 Y( D# N9 `, c* Q2 P. q: w2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.! ]8 [- H" s; V: x" e" F" V
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.$ b6 g; F5 v  o, C9 M# r& y3 g
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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' W6 B- V$ h+ m3 }4 t+ Q0 S% l1 vRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US./ Q, O8 f1 M0 k% J% H$ e/ S5 G8 s

8 R  I9 o8 `' Q1 }) X7 E) l$ OThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
大型搬家
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: 8 H  g% J  k; ^2 o' i+ b* g; H+ E" ^
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。" j+ Y" }% i9 ?. L/ i
怎么理解?
3 d0 }- r, N' x1 O" ~$ h, P50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
6# cyz0116
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- d) M. D8 V4 v1 |不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。( e: O3 Z. Q3 I$ R2 h$ b
怎么理解?
9 F  I. k: s  G4 ?9 S+ c50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
6 t6 i) z/ A4 ^" a# s9 ^8 I1 m# ^cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳 & y* t- b) u2 K  p7 b" ^

1 V( z5 z5 ^' K2 m- [  G; B我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
大型搬家
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