 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Originally posted by shuishijie at 2005-6-24 12:15 PM:; t+ x0 `! X$ h. K
i sense a little tension here
3 Z1 U! ~1 H2 h9 ~" T4 K4 Psorry, i didn't mean you by 'you' which is a general reference.7 h3 N. x1 r# a& g
back to our discussion, you are absolutely right.
1 A8 M: R, L0 z- c# T" L# g3 `! iif she/he 有那金刚钻, ie. intelligence and self-control, then she/he 就能揽这瓷器活儿.
; b2 d% p0 O9 R$ ?6 U/ x& A4 HFurthermore, if she/he cheated and is able to hide it for the rest of her/his life, then she/he has to bear with the guilty for the rest of her/his life.9 R$ t# r0 U8 k3 O$ \; _* S h' X
If both cheated and can face it very well, then both of them will be worried if the other will cheat again.
7 Z! V P' U( d" e3 d4 a7 UIf both are not worried about the other cheating, then is this a marriage you want?
( K" \8 D, }1 G, ]0 W8 k7 gNot mean you here 2 s% V# R; c/ E/ ^5 ]5 P
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没有没有,没有任何敌意, 随便聊天。
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9 b0 T6 p) _8 P! c其实我只是说一种可能性,并没有道德评价,或者人身安插。0 c+ V8 w q" j8 Z N4 g: v
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你后面的三种情形,不同的人,不同的情商,不同的原则,处理情况也不同,有的一样可以花好月圆,有的则是一团乱麻。所以我说的“金刚钻“的比喻,是说没有大家都搞定的本事(搞定情人老婆劳工和自己),就别冒险。
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比如前几天看到杂志里谈到“处理婚外恋“说得好,向你的伴侣坦白之前,先想一想,如果你只是想摆脱guilty感觉,那么向伴侣坦白,等于把自己的负担转移给你的伴侣而已,对你的婚姻毫无好处,那么不如跟心理医生讲述。除非这次婚外行为有性疾病的可能,你需要带你的伴侣去就医。所以还是说呢, if you can not take the heat, get out of the kitchen.+ ?" e6 L3 A% I, g5 ?+ x+ u, P
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我本人对夫妻远距离生存,各找临时情人,是持理解通融的态度的。我并不羡慕那些多年分离还守身如玉的夫妻。当然我也崇尚夫妻的忠诚,所以我更希望的是常相厮守。 |
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