 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
# j. l r4 I" ^" t- F- z9 d请注意,以下序号都是1不是误写( F9 ?' [! j# h( _
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
) q9 x/ V5 h. y6 W& }1 {0 R1,男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫) p2 }$ ^$ X! p% v. N* } v
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
, O0 p7 q/ r$ ~5 y( tdown.
& z& F3 m/ Y% J( p- i) t* a$ mWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about 1 d& u9 o B/ \ g4 \, E, f9 X" I
you
% ~7 E( h X+ U, K2 [. uleaving it down.0 \# w- S# Z/ `$ Q7 U. {
1,学会使用马桶盖,你是个大姑娘了,马桶盖要是翻起来了,你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来,你们需要放下去,你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去?- U: A4 [8 |* f# t) v
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.8 H2 l; C' O" R0 f* }) P0 U
Let it be.2 {% J$ A$ Q$ Q# T( P3 M
1,周日的体育,无论它像满月还是潮汐,随他去
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it$ B0 c( G* P: A: B) o
that way.
4 C8 V# R' Y5 v; y1,购物不是体育。不,也别指望我们能那么想!
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! S. c2 J8 L4 Q+ y4 ~. k1. Crying is blackmail.
# P) ^# B3 W" |8 G1,哭泣是敲诈
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" p+ V1 c. f8 k q1. Ask for what you want.. A& M4 X v7 ^8 A- i; g! E8 V
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!; r1 i1 `. P1 c, p g
Strong hints do not work!$ y/ x: }/ y3 `5 _4 O3 h, ~$ D
Obvious hints do not work!
! d7 x' d7 l, w7 C3 d y: TJust say it!5 \7 @* V& C4 \. y; X2 X
1,你想要什么就说
; |2 I7 z/ F- ]# X8 z我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!1 X. P( Q9 b* A7 t6 j
0 c1 d6 p$ k2 @: }1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
8 H; i* c. `' y" W% c+ hquestion.7 D6 E2 h/ \4 G( S, i) |+ K
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 (意思是,丈夫仅仅说是,不是,妻子不满意)
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
4 v }% b0 o- v1 Z' M& Swhat we do.0 @( |- F/ [; |! G7 ^+ z9 }
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
9 J" Q/ V w# A j3 y& ~1,如果你有麻烦,可以来找我们帮助解决,可是不要仅仅为了获取同情,那是你们女朋友的责任。& X5 v+ z# R' I2 }: e
7 W% t2 u1 j# f1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.) l/ @7 s( f% l: C% z
1,你要是头疼了17个月,那你应该看医生去$ v2 h9 K: x) Z# e6 A( g
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
9 e$ b: I1 q: i* p# R* sIn fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
: m% `# k& _( [我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及,事实上,我们说的话7天后就作废了* F% b m' [7 c3 O6 ]
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us4 f! M5 ^# _' q h% f
to act like soap opera guys.) }# P' j( s5 P+ [) c
1,如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密(性感品牌)的女孩子们,那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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% s+ r* L$ [1 n' r8 a. c1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
8 x( _$ s$ H+ I1,你要是觉得你胖,那你八成就胖,别问我们
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' R+ F) y2 T: i* x4 e1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
( _2 H( E0 c9 @4 A) J3 @makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.2 ^% S- n- D1 K$ r" u) m7 e
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思,而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒,那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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(谁有工夫继续一下,谢谢)" k& R. ^7 s" J6 |' r% `5 [
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
: a, w) {0 j2 w2 a6 ~2 Odone. Not both.. @6 @* {, j0 O& [1 ^ ?* n
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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, U# X* h1 N1 X& v( I6 S! [1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during0 Z0 P7 C( F' Y& V
commercials.* \$ J+ ^7 |9 o p
( w$ Y, w8 t2 k1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.4 m% n6 M( I1 ?) o! s6 y
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
8 X& s @( z: {5 ~1 NPeach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.9 ]9 q [) f1 }' T$ g
We have no idea what mauve is.2 s6 X+ e9 O9 _
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.! S7 z& W D. T4 r H, M
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
( A" `0 O6 o2 f9 E" R# s: Wnothing's wrong.
+ D7 x' h& c- c" xWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.) u' I+ ]6 p& Z2 q
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer2 C0 d, f4 C" u
you don't want to hear.
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& S4 e# ~ e$ `$ a1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
+ S( {5 m1 d' b) Ifine...Really.
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/ i% j2 g# _; n$ w& @5 B" w1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
0 U$ W: n4 u( e6 }& idiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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1. You have enough clothes.
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# `" n! W, X8 F* p j1. You have too many shoes.
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
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6 h% ~. U* c1 b1 [% s8 {$ Z1. Thank you for reading this.
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
4 D' f. k: Y4 W! DBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.8 v0 \7 Y2 T/ h& t
" Q! a) [ W: v+ R4 K8 xPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh. _$ a, A& z6 T, Y: u% @
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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