 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!% r# ^. z: o& P4 Q5 c
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
# X7 D% g* w% v. y1 m9 g- Q1 l1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it2 @) J! g/ R; y" g% F
down.
( r( m: s( M$ P" H( [We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about : g5 L) L, N6 z
you/ ?/ y( Q" u$ G9 u; k$ w6 t
leaving it down.2 t; F% E/ {2 Z/ e' `# j: c; f
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
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# O# K# m- |( m2 W$ o5 a1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
! L) U. I# X% o* M* x* T* wLet it be.
- |4 Z/ p) M: o. [; i; f2 o1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去" X0 S& B C! j% }) R+ j8 b
$ o) D+ v5 A( {* \) @8 q0 o1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
8 W9 k* @7 S0 H, I% }that way.
1 q7 Q/ |1 q$ y! B1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！% S5 l3 u5 q/ ^" L3 H2 s; Y
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1. Crying is blackmail.6 D7 @( O0 a7 z) Z9 n) R1 r+ X) c
1，哭泣是敲诈
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+ m! `" s, M3 M0 z1 p' p1. Ask for what you want.
, x* h& x6 L- y8 G2 D1 dLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
7 l% R W, [7 [6 T zStrong hints do not work!5 K0 L m2 E7 s$ e6 {1 I$ A6 o& [% }
Obvious hints do not work!
' }2 g7 _& f9 \5 v: P! U% j7 gJust say it!4 q% D h" q& n
1，你想要什么就说, ^# |3 _; R3 ], S9 ~
我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！6 K+ y9 j3 n2 _9 W
+ I6 b! m9 q# T, N. u6 w o; v1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every , H2 \$ G+ k8 W2 x# e* }
question.0 W% A4 h4 [0 ^; I& e( G% g
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）0 d, h* o6 k0 m1 {* B
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's% Q; Q; K- U- w" V) ~1 C
what we do.+ V# m, ]1 ^9 Z
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
( A4 @1 L9 f& j% j( M1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.0 C4 ?, R7 p; S* f3 y, R7 |
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument." P4 z5 r) X) b- ]) K+ e
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.0 U0 J, \2 J& a! Z( f+ o3 ?: k2 z
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了$ a! t& K: \0 i$ E. t' g
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us/ h' F. x. C" m: `8 {5 U
to act like soap opera guys.
4 V& {" m+ d1 T' d0 W1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
& U7 ?( m3 w6 y7 e5 N1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
3 s# A3 a/ [8 z6 K' N0 lmakes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.' x$ i) _9 U3 w2 u- ]
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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m! e8 a. l5 l) \8 E4 t, H（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）* v/ U4 k6 M6 Z/ s/ a7 X6 C/ \
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
% F0 _8 W2 N7 G: F+ ]7 }5 v. `done. Not both.3 S8 S/ _- ~) |+ i5 O
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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( d: t" t" s6 b1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during' t; Z% f2 y7 c4 g- c# X' \) k- Q
commercials.
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7 f- j' `' x3 a3 }: b# ~1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.+ N+ L2 r6 V- [0 V+ n
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
5 J) w3 I4 s7 |3 j, LPeach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.2 p; O1 m3 n" Z
We have no idea what mauve is." S& Z$ X; T+ p* x6 b6 ^
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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, {& A8 \+ g6 u9 Q, I" a1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like* ]. t' W# `# \' h) e: M
nothing's wrong.3 m$ a9 ^7 |8 C; `6 Z
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.+ ^- F# P- }, l6 r: L2 ?6 o
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
) b/ X8 h6 b7 Iyou don't want to hear.( D2 f3 ^6 ]9 F- I/ }, E
: ^2 Q0 x. y: h, N1 t1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
6 e, S1 F) g2 r. z' }- @+ M, Ffine...Really.
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2 j. R. C8 ]# A3 ^* T; b1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
; b/ h* S, b. H# u& b5 ~discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.) E$ i3 @& W: K
' w+ R# z5 c3 _# R5 k: \0 j1. You have enough clothes.
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1. You have too many shoes.
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. l) w% ?' m6 q/ a5 c s3 T/ ~1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
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1. Thank you for reading this.
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;6 \ e7 t# K- O9 a3 {
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping., p& \* R" W! D! ^, }* u1 @- Q
3 W0 P8 c( {- ?( ^Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
" c: Q) o. }+ M. P2 q/ z8 xPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
