In the garden of my heart

Dawson

听《All I want to do...》有感，涂鸦了这首小诗。见笑，见笑！

8 j8 p) I- F2 Y9 z# MIn the garden of my heart
You planted a tree
From sunset til dawn
Through darkness to light
Nourished with my soul
3 V+ T6 ?0 B; V0 R4 Y6 O5 s: z4 L0 rDevoured my sorrow by thee

In the memory of my life
You planted a dream
5 @: K% ?; O2 P& z0 fShould the sky fall down on me
8 z7 H& s8 X  L/ l; QMay promises fade in the sea
" `# d' C" ^0 |: u6 H7 dSewing back every broken pieces
Bursting the love out of me
+ T" U0 c6 m/ s6 D3 o6 s$ u
[mu]http://penguin.spss.sd59.bc.ca/~mqiu/images/without.mp3[/mu]

云山水月

原帖由 Dawson 于 2006-6-25 01:05 发表
听《All I want to do...》有感，涂鸦了这首小诗。见笑，见笑！

# o6 Y& n2 n/ Z3 aIn the garden of my heart
You planted a tree
' H* F$ z0 G/ v) N# UFrom sunset til dawn
Through darkness to light
! y4 F$ s! p1 SNourished with my soul
. M. ^  J; ~. }# F6 {3 F9 mDevoured my so ...

% o) g% X; e+ ]" ]; M$ v6 q5 p
% ^$ n/ X% u- v- @. ]眼没花哈。。。第一首本版的英文诗吧？
4 `& z& k( K% E- l) Y
写得真好。
6 x" V; p% m. ~! Q0 P8 e
加精加精！

Greatwall

哥们儿，你没喝多吧？没事就过来烧烟啊！

九月

汗！居然有２单词不认识。：（

Justing

原帖由 云山水月 于 2006-6-25 01:08 发表
: F2 n3 \4 D9 f' x8 G1 l9 q% v眼没花哈。。。第一首本版的英文诗吧？
- x* Y0 u& ]/ K) [0 k写得真好。
3 a  I' C& o# w$ l7 ^5 r0 z加精加精！

4 y4 j- i1 y6 I; W' g我曾在本版也发过一首英文诗

五月

如果能谱上曲, 夕阳西下，在海天相接的海边, 轻抚吉他浅唱, 定是首动人的心曲。

微澜

原帖由 五月 于 2006-6-25 05:31 发表
; X( V6 S+ x/ p5 t6 R( N; G如果能谱上曲, 夕阳西下，在海天相接的海边, 轻抚吉他浅唱, 定是首动人的心曲。

五月JJ这个意境，想想实在是罗曼蒂克，不过在爱屯，海天相接是没有了，只有在湖畔雪山了：）

朱顺顺

Should the sky fall down on me--- leave out "down", as is  no good here.
! `1 e  K; u" W8 W
Sewing back every broken pieces--- every broken piece, or all broken pieces.

Dawson

原帖由 红岫添乱 于 2006-6-29 11:06 发表
& W6 }! k0 W5 VShould the sky fall down on me--- leave out "down", as is  no good here.
$ `. r! _$ D5 W+ D8 d7 w
Sewing back every broken pieces--- every broken piece, or all broken pieces.

* t$ a. S/ n$ K4 Y" w! }9 G9 O' fThanks for your insightful comment, however I have to disagree with what you said.
" U; c) f! V. Q# `0 }
  J( M2 Y+ @& h, |# ?4 D& o% h1) Sky falls down on sb. is a very common phrase or idom that's been used in a lot of occasions, meaning end of the world. For example, it was used in Savage Garden's song "truly deeply madly".

' E, Y' a" L! w: F5 }2) Every broken pieces, hmmm, again broken pieces is a phrase, I know grammar wise it looks awkard, but that "S" at the end puts a nice rythem to the poem.

月光宝盒

红岫添乱 这喜滋滋的头像虽很农民，但很喜气！很有乐在其中的意境啊！

FCUK

thee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。
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& w* q7 I/ O3 a) z" K0 aShall I compare thee to a Summer's day?

五月

原帖由 FCUK 于 2006-7-2 10:50 发表
1 E# `! b6 E6 V: p$ M# K; c4 Vthee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。

Shall I compare thee to a Summer's day?

. _8 J5 O4 }" @# r4 Q3 x! m& m
诗歌, 重在意境和语感, 没有那么严格教条的语法要求吧.

Dawson

原帖由 FCUK 于 2006-7-2 10:50 发表
* M6 h: o, x9 B; j  _thee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。

Shall I compare thee to a Summer's day?

; O( M8 l4 g2 R# B+ |6 ?7 z3 A4 s
有啊，有很多经典的例子。
" X' @7 z) J5 p. N) ?1 m" ^
比如Sharon A. Bryington那首著名的《While Waiting For Thee》

Don't weep at my grave
For I am not there,
I've a date with a butterfly
; \2 S! e; n; A2 o6 [: u0 `To dance on the air.
0 c6 k5 ~# p4 W( k) k& JIf I'm missed, find a flower,
I'll be there too,
. q* U8 [* N5 S- K- d) ]Sniffing it's fragrance
Right next to you.

Don't be sad
8 G9 d5 W& D2 K1 q* XWhen you remember me,
For I'm singing in the sunshine,
Wild and free,
Flirting with the lighting,
Playing tag with the wind,
Chasing the thunder
; I1 {& K6 B: E3 e  y8 o8 hTime and again,
% d: e; t$ P# f( ~+ l4 E, ASoaring with the eagle,
8 ^: ~$ z4 ~1 `2 vSwimming in the sea,
Enjoying all of nature
While I'm waiting for thee.