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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA1 r* i% s2 Z7 r b
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1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math.
8 A/ X$ |) A* N* q( i8 l1 n$ N2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
# D) v# f5 F6 ?3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations.
0 O, l q1 o0 u/ t$ _8 j! N4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on.
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0 Y9 D, T! H' y3 r# E G2 P& u& h( c6 UTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA
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1. Big rock between you and B.C. ! {" z9 o/ e! W' q# I
2. Ottawa who?
0 V8 i+ ~; Y9 f* N3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country.
) ^- x, C& I; Y5 d6 X4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of. % M4 k: Y3 { ]1 `* H
5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country. 2 Q* x1 o& Q, G9 W
6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups. , A, @; e0 y0 S3 X5 m2 v
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN ( P8 n6 ?: ]: `2 v5 T0 Q7 |
9 [; q: v( Z$ n1. You never run out of wheat. 2 `1 n# y1 x& ?0 h7 h4 A
2. Your province is really easy to draw. ! n4 w6 W0 T3 n( l9 h
3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours. ( p; k6 Q7 A& b6 a7 Q# `! F
4. People will assume you live on a farm. : h( }) ~6 n4 `& J: b) g
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA 6 Z$ V- `( ]3 d1 c/ Q9 B
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1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property.
# H4 A2 Q' A* ~9 a3 T" ?+ o2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes. 2 C, ]' _; n+ v8 a K
3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter. 2 a" x1 k, J {+ w& U
4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood. 7 t' e& L0 i$ Y4 H# t$ \/ C7 m
5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO
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1. You live in the centre of the universe.
/ _6 U* O) N6 ]4 i2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump. 8 `3 d6 v, w7 _1 K1 p. @( t
3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election. % U9 i4 N" z5 {; F
4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime. 1 G( ]. ~/ z& Y) o4 M$ ?
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC % T! G4 N- d2 r! Y% f2 [3 H
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1. Racism is socially acceptable 5 K1 {) H. X6 ~1 _5 n5 Q- g; P$ f- W9 O
2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next. " ~" @$ Y2 @) n8 w, N ?/ x
3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada. & V. w- P) S7 {8 O; |. p
4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *" r' c+ E; H4 G) \' r/ e' ], H2 ?
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK : y% [5 s: |% t) y3 T8 F
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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3 N" P+ E" n$ e0 J# E0 ^9 ?7 b Q1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income. % h; u; N4 r/ ^# W) t( L
2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies. 0 y/ c& u" `3 _
3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick
" f6 ^( A; [0 }: e4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse. ) y& i# k+ `# J7 c) e; ]0 J% k/ M
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA
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* j* k8 @5 K: s' m. R' T# [2 M) U1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can. ) Z# u8 l1 A% ~' P' i0 @& o
2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt. * p- u! f& J) L! }8 h" K3 b, {- L
3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
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1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge. 6 @ B: X% A# O4 k# ^
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour. 8 D9 ^# J3 w% b2 {( m3 O' r8 @
3. You can drive across the province in two minutes. % s6 [+ [9 x3 z- }6 e
4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea."
; Y, a5 d% n' L1 K/ s% X5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from. % Z& q- o# U# Y. q* i
6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night. 9 Q5 e7 c n8 H3 i# \$ E; p
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND
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$ q: m( O* n# A) V1 n1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
& Y2 E5 ]0 V. a% |2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse.
+ Q+ z$ [! i5 W4 s v3. The workday is about two hours long. 3 j# v' K A" e: i8 a
4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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