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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA# K P5 c6 C6 c4 N5 Q# y
8 c' j$ i% D2 s& U5 ?1 W" v1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math. & l Y+ s v3 x3 }1 {
2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
7 j# A, S1 ~ t' n. x, T) \4 F3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations.
+ H: o9 R: N$ a* f+ G4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA
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+ N, ~. u, J9 ?; j1 x1. Big rock between you and B.C. 5 A& @3 ]; K- E, w- ?: k( O
2. Ottawa who?4 W! J( b/ S: I( R! J
3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country. & G; B+ @3 E' {
4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of. 1 v3 b6 h+ F3 o
5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country. 3 X" W5 ~7 K( L( N; |0 V% V( p
6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups. % d: T) @5 t5 `
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN ( I2 Y" M7 f+ Q8 o' v# H
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1. You never run out of wheat.
7 r: z5 Z1 q- E; R W6 f! @2. Your province is really easy to draw.
& [ C5 g! x7 ~7 ?# r4 p3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.
2 m- J+ w9 z/ v; M# @% J4. People will assume you live on a farm. 9 i, u. X8 m6 b! i! b3 b* d
# P! M! _: T! Z$ U) K2 JTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA
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1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property.
$ A0 {% u; \0 J( |$ z; P2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes. . ^4 u, Y( {2 w2 ^% N. X
3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter. $ _9 t' ] u5 I- r
4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood. * J: ~3 ^# K+ m; I: ]% u( ^
5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by. ) g4 p8 Q/ B2 S" l& q
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: |. r- ~, ^) j2 X, iTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO 8 G+ m3 I7 c0 s6 Y
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1. You live in the centre of the universe. ) ? ?; ]* ?. ]! J+ Q
2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.
1 U( t$ S/ z# ^* W7 V3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election. * \* o7 ?5 n. B8 U9 G/ }0 B
4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime. 9 f5 s! Q& N$ K; B
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC
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1. Racism is socially acceptable ; ], L. k0 K/ y- b6 x R# K
2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next.
6 t* P5 S* L# I$ g# I# t; a3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada.
& g+ t) s4 b$ m2 F: q4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *" x) I1 N7 h3 g, [
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK / I, X: v1 {' m8 s8 Y
. R. ~7 d; n% sTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK ! u+ g4 M& A1 K6 f
/ x/ X/ Z- @6 y; {' o. e1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income.
, i) S; {' c# E3 c* y2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies.
! X: Q- g$ _5 h4 D1 ]) s9 |3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick
8 k2 [6 g8 \- `2 M; F4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA
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, M! c+ Q5 b0 w1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.
: H% J j4 j& X m, m4 X y2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt. 0 ]+ X N# ]) l- X& A
3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money. # C \( f; e9 I( E o! p$ ]% n
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4 Q o8 S- b+ I( T! o ETOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND 8 n. l; q+ h3 _. N' l5 g6 c$ z6 \# F
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1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge. ( I: l: z- |( Q- w: L& ~$ B0 j- y# S0 q' p8 m
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour. 7 h' t" L2 e8 C
3. You can drive across the province in two minutes.
- j5 o; Z4 ?' i( E* y% |4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea."
+ U* J. ?9 C% j5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from.
7 E9 B D# H3 j9 z9 E+ S/ o* m6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.
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' z7 k& v! H$ z. c% o( U% }# w6 U" ?TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND
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1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
+ w% d4 N0 L8 n# u; U2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse. - Y% u: R( d) `: `+ q- E5 S. f# M
3. The workday is about two hours long.
1 `' l1 C) W: F( D4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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