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( @4 E$ N S& x% R5 `. M. {Why did God make mothers?
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
' M4 |2 X$ p) }" E% B2. Mostly to clean the house. 9 I% E( c+ ^! Z/ L% e) e
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
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How did God make mothers? & i- }3 v4 N- S) ?9 d" V* Q
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us. f% T( u5 Z: | z- }
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
- l2 ~: N; |' h# D* q" n4 S3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. # R! m( g6 ]5 }1 h0 Q
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What ingredients are mothers made of ? 6 [5 c) n3 N# D' N
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
/ D2 ]8 P& V& U) f& r r2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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+ {) d& S0 M. L& lWhy did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
8 K9 y; k) Q5 o3 E) G4 A1. We're related., E+ M/ d) P( V: D
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. 3 [$ O1 _! F5 |! L; |+ P
/ |* p0 Q& l# i& tWhat kind of little girl was your mom?
7 V! z2 g/ b2 B% l8 i4 @: x1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. 8 p z8 Z# D- A
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
9 x0 f/ _& ]6 x0 @- q+ m# T3. They say she used to be nice.
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
; q" f: e! u* B9 w! h6 A N1. His last name./ [8 j8 M2 }9 r6 P( ~/ J1 t
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
/ k+ e3 L& C" P8 @' w; p$ x: L3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
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) H$ O$ t+ I8 A, Z& nWhy did your mom marry your dad?
4 G& I2 F2 M w6 ?1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. n7 E. K$ q+ k6 `; }
2. She got too old to do anything else with him. * j7 U( q0 A8 e2 _+ d1 k
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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: E5 m5 a* B' nWho's the boss at your house?
4 u' Y! z# C: B. s/ \! x1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. ; K' F* o3 r+ D
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.' A; m; F- r% p$ Y9 c) H
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. ' P F# W d3 v1 r" C
4 [/ E% T9 I i( @What's the difference between moms & dads? 2 J& F- ^3 j' G# _/ e" j {
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work. 8 y! }/ [) n5 c& b8 {# d
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
1 U8 ^' s& y/ p9 F% C3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
' r, Q& \8 S- T) R b7 t2 z+ v9 J4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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What does your mom do in her spare time?
; o. F0 C8 r1 l- b8 O2 G9 } Z1. Mothers don't do spare time.8 o# w6 x# `' P0 C
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
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/ ?0 T7 D2 J( N5 l6 X/ qWhat would it take to make your mom perfect? 1 d8 Y7 J% c$ T( h) n+ H
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.8 D& h, A3 G* u; j$ N! s# c0 N
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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. x1 c$ |: {! c! A$ Q8 k9 F& bIf you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? ! f5 J, C9 w w X. E; N6 M7 e
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. 4 F" W$ O# @2 x0 z/ t2 S: D( F2 l
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.% q# h3 M( P- g" T- B: v
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head. % L4 R. N6 l+ u
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