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0 G0 ?) T: p uWhy did God make mothers?
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
% O% W4 m& L4 `5 ?# Z2. Mostly to clean the house.
0 } R6 f0 s6 P3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. 7 v) C/ ?7 j7 _2 c* ~
5 M& h, c% B& _) ?How did God make mothers? * I- a' j5 V. J6 k1 A; R
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
& I6 |6 ? T' G) r- Z3 { r2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
/ C, V+ M5 a$ i3 g3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
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What ingredients are mothers made of ?
) \% z3 ]6 D2 }/ k) o1 q u1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
% ~( r$ d! @" A2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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% M7 _: q4 @* g7 YWhy did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
" X: `! S4 l! [; b$ ^6 s1. We're related.7 z, O, \8 x" Q) R; @
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
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What kind of little girl was your mom? ( M% v( v! F5 d) Z+ O7 V
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. 9 R$ H9 w1 a! G+ F+ e' S
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
1 F5 X8 |1 ?, v3. They say she used to be nice.
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
# D6 J% e# G% |1 c( ?0 W l. v1. His last name.
" T" u2 y$ B' U1 x% O2 ~2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
' i8 [7 |' A6 k& u3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? , j# A+ O0 L. l# \3 h
% z8 ?8 {$ p! z8 ]5 w. oWhy did your mom marry your dad? " n; E8 m x/ C" ^5 E8 e' [! q0 [
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. $ N3 E% C' e& S: q# B) h1 m& r, H0 e+ p
2. She got too old to do anything else with him. 6 k% C! A- k% }7 m& ^6 D/ O
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. 5 g4 q _2 R5 _! b( T
+ V0 O; ?1 `/ ^) FWho's the boss at your house? E$ A8 [3 C) O
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
' D; r; m3 \# }9 q2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
2 Q8 M8 I' B1 H' w" ]( j) N3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. ! O, e0 _* g7 t1 x: _
4 V" x, p r; U6 PWhat's the difference between moms & dads?
1 T' K% w$ T$ S+ b4 ^. F1 N1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
( H) l( d' h4 ?1 f8 P. O7 [# J2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.9 L$ Q- |1 l2 n( {
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. $ I7 A" z9 ~# I9 t( Z
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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What does your mom do in her spare time? - u: k# O+ K. H
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
}+ ~1 V3 I5 v* `9 [, v$ ^+ ^2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
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1 p/ N# W y5 [5 ]4 C& C7 @, ~What would it take to make your mom perfect? ; V9 N. |! d% k, j. j& }/ d q
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery." E9 i" u0 h$ W0 N" n
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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3 {' W, y" H0 x2 d e% k+ \* _If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
( B3 \& V- m1 K& n% ]3 R1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
) n0 Y) G; T, o2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.- v" [- K, X0 s" _; R3 `
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head. / j X [* i" [
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