Never Say to a Cop:

OliveOil

NEVER SAY TO A COP:
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& U" x& Z0 n6 U" e* k9 D. }1 `: |1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas)
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2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.
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- y9 o" `$ r- A/ g( x3. Aren't you the guy from the Village People?

/ a# ~: z+ S% s8 w# K4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!

$ Y4 W3 E7 j+ o- c) V5. Are You Andy or Barney?

6 @& p; ?: @3 m- T  z5 I6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.

8 I9 ]5 M$ n/ H; Y7. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?
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+ m. s* ?1 V3 x, y* W+ O9 v8. I pay your salary!
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9. Gee, Office r! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!
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# E6 }2 t, U3 f+ L' I10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.

$ L" y4 J0 m# G4 P11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.
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) T7 Q0 `; G5 V: G; s12. When the Officer says "Gee .Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with, "Gee, Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"