Never Say to a Cop:

OliveOil

NEVER SAY TO A COP:
) b$ `1 z* {# X' Z
7 ^2 L2 l: [6 `1 c' s* ]6 Q9 ~1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas)

2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

" {% e% `* v" g( l, ^* ]3 l3. Aren't you the guy from the Village People?
* K, j. A+ a* x$ N
$ h. Z& K8 F# B$ s: S4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!

5. Are You Andy or Barney?
/ D; _9 O% D# @0 D3 e9 I+ K! S
$ \3 Z! n& Z/ Y: [7 u, J6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.
& Q/ m. G: B+ N. Z
7. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?
' C6 T* G! _1 F. f: G
* K. F! x0 Z0 |( {4 `8. I pay your salary!
6 A4 f& E7 p1 x5 m! @' W6 p8 R
9. Gee, Office r! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!
9 d. ^: h9 T7 i/ d! i& }
10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.
" V; E) |0 I- Q1 W: ^- D) w% F
9 i4 t8 J  ]9 T2 e7 s1 s7 Z1 y11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.

" a! d) n* O  a+ G12. When the Officer says "Gee .Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with, "Gee, Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"