 鲜花( 77)  鸡蛋( 0)
|
Blonde Car Accident
9 [- P2 b& A+ X" m( I3 M: o1 tOne day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.& G) S! A+ f. e& G
% _. \$ m |. N% j: Z" N- `The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.
2 j o" n/ X9 a2 D' |5 G- o" H1 l' L9 V1 e/ l; [
He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.
, S$ {. D5 _7 k
. D0 M7 g! Q# C! e( g/ c8 r$ r/ yFurious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.
5 h2 I$ |( u7 x0 v. Z5 f
# C# ?( F4 X$ x2 w7 zThe blonde started laughing.& P, X) C- u+ M" Y
( A( |# `- R* a& ?$ S' E* ~This made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.
* l. E, e4 I/ u+ ^/ M% E1 Z9 @5 f
: S/ d T8 M2 @: }) }3 {' |: G ?4 iThis time the blonde laughed even harder.
, s+ G5 g i: ~
8 |9 j) ]+ ^* Y, J4 VLivid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.
5 Z( @! Z5 `' Q* `+ K9 ~! g
7 E9 F: H) b3 ^. z" ZThe blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.
. u: f% A# ?. Q5 m% ]" N; Q+ V; x# }3 M. p. f" f
The blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"
5 o. D: H+ ]3 n: C s, w' J. s/ O
; d: ]! ?# C. h! _Rowing Your Boat
y( h7 r3 `( A) H! XTwo blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat.
+ W7 ]; x# E" J1 b, c
) a* J2 A8 G1 _+ D0 f6 O! @3 kThe driver blonde turned to her friend and said "You know - it's blondes like that that give us a bad name!"+ {$ d' t* q! M- M1 x
9 E% ^6 e- n& T6 c) K. F5 V
To this, the other blonde replies "I know it, and if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and drown her."
& V. t8 [" s# F* P% d
) F( v% P% G! l! T+ r aI Want to Buy That
4 j2 @- j1 i" m/ y1 {1 CA blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner.# ~8 f' S8 R5 Q' T2 J% A
, w F, Z) _: \; \' s# UThe clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black.
1 D. q2 t) @0 \! h; m1 g$ K
: E, ^. M3 F: g7 x) j# Y/ rThe next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.# y1 l+ x) ^, j: x2 _" d& W& F
5 m& k5 ?) q" m! H6 r
Frustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red.
& t9 N3 L3 b5 X8 u' P" \! G6 ~, P. K! ]: w9 |
Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time.; r3 @3 y: a4 E; [3 n- Z( ~
- W- k0 L4 ?( \ ~To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes./ K' [+ D4 A$ [, X5 |0 E- T
9 j% {2 G% n+ L; J- S- dThe blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"* m, f3 e! p8 D$ B X
4 ]! }! J* a' }/ q& IThe clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV -- it's a microwave!"% M; ~# Q9 I; {9 I, c
- b, l( z5 {- S
Are You Really Sure?) W |& x9 A0 k' s) C& |
A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"
" p; t# I& Y; _( P! t+ y, o5 Z' o( ~2 k0 \3 n A
In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something."; Q2 ~7 J2 M" N+ P' j
) \# v2 W L; j. u, Z8 V3 |. C$ ?
Our bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"* w- U6 h: e* ^
1 h! l( E* S9 p# I! l" J* cThe blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
# @6 l- z& y7 k' ? K! d; a3 H1 [5 d+ W! b/ O
Blonde Sky Divers
( w( I/ g1 L7 N1 S! UA blonde and a brunette are skydiving.9 C0 s) @; r! L# J, Q7 U7 r
' y4 e9 h/ a+ n$ q3 j4 f! nThe brunette jumps out the plane and pulls the cord -- nothing happens.* m' B- u B' q1 X
: E; |$ u% {, ~' L0 p( I- E+ G1 dShe pulls the emergency cord and still nothing.
4 U- t' B1 J3 \0 r8 ^2 f
3 \# K4 w. O$ F5 K3 tThe blonde finally jumps out of the plane and yells "Oh! So you wanna race, huh?"
/ N4 {3 q' q' b- ^, g6 b
# v8 u5 ?& T4 [" z0 L' t- l[ 本帖最后由 Xbfeng 于 2008-10-7 13:31 编辑 ] |
|