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English language

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?  i: u8 t4 _* M: f; d

8 ]7 t% K; c/ MLet's face it
! y+ o" O* ?. M* z& {4 {6 nEnglish is a stupid language., u. e) P1 c/ P( {4 {
There is no egg in the eggplant
4 A' Q3 c8 d+ `No ham in the hamburger
1 c. h9 T1 `( S6 F) _0 }7 _And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.4 t! Q. I5 j3 u
English muffins were not invented in England) ^" o/ d' K# i% Z
French fries were not invented in France.
5 P# X" m9 N$ m. H: l4 o# T# U% I
We sometimes take English for granted
1 ]! t8 D6 e) TBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that# D. _' z% s7 w. a( ~
Quicksand takes you down slowly8 V) T6 I% s# b  H3 v2 |! ~
Boxing rings are square' A4 \) L6 \  R7 n" r3 S$ N
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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( Q( I% K6 x+ ~& f/ k0 IIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
9 m7 e( {$ G- UIf the plural of tooth is teeth% t& T3 y$ f8 j/ K5 _- C
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
/ o- s8 I, ~, @8 q7 N- X, L- jIf the teacher taught,
$ m8 S- b9 \" v% O0 b. gWhy didn't the preacher praught.
. n3 s  G5 a& K2 p( X+ P& f- c4 e% I
If a vegetarian eats vegetables- a, x/ e, b# m1 L) h# H) Q
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?3 L1 Y1 P8 u/ O5 `& U
Why do people recite at a play% z' N7 |& m8 e0 l, e
Yet play at a recital?2 a; v/ k! z/ l. ~; J% L
Park on driveways and
( `6 Y/ y9 y- I* W# rDrive on parkways
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$ W; ~- v& R6 t9 D) ^$ V( P: cYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
( ^. r; A; G, p# ]! POf a language where a house can burn up as
0 t& y8 d  \7 j2 k6 UIt burns down
2 @! [) q2 b1 C7 o( P" _5 Q& z. nAnd in which you fill in a form
( W+ ]' ]3 g5 t6 b* a$ ]By filling it out
! r# s4 ?4 k. K8 J) dAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
% Y4 z1 D9 |% ~8 S5 i5 f0 q2 K: T; t, o
English was invented by people, not computers
3 n. f. x$ D! TAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race& Z% o9 F* z" {3 R) G/ L9 X
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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That is why7 ^/ q! ~  G; ~9 `" C# K
When the stars are out they are visible% D# O9 C0 g( a; S! m5 t: c
But when the lights are out they are invisible
- t3 h) c. u3 Z( K/ J- j9 YAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
; `0 t0 `" D: SIt starts/ \: g9 s4 [- L1 |, ^8 B! ]# r+ p3 l
But when I wind up this observation,- L7 b% F4 P& x% b2 t3 u
It ends.
大型搬家
鲜花(78) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 18:40 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(143) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:08 | 显示全部楼层

典型的中国人写出的E文.该文写的非常差

我看了几行,就看不下去了.: J% B$ w! q3 l( h4 m/ l" a% R
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.# Y. o. [, a' X/ {- K
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
1 @8 N9 ~1 ~: q: m7 a6 s6 j5 A3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.+ Q5 L/ G! T. n3 C& \; z5 T
4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
+ {* q: A4 \8 m1 b* i  t) k其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.
鲜花(143) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:20 | 显示全部楼层

而且就E文本身而言

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.
大型搬家
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-28 12:24 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-28 16:13 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
* c2 U; o. U; t我看了几行,就看不下去了.4 ]! l  {, H6 Z. o
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.2 W" K% ]  u  d4 Y# P
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...
1 q! s9 V. A  L* x. u
/ F  n3 j3 q5 B' q
谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢?5 L) j. {' a9 D) O( }. A2 B
实话讲,这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-12-11 21:29 | 显示全部楼层
能写出此文的人,一定是深得英文精髓。幽默,有趣。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-12-12 18:54 | 显示全部楼层
我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗?如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-12-20 16:07 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-12-30 05:33 | 显示全部楼层

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