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Tiger s Holiday Poem; b" d: B5 G# G8 `! v; w& _, S
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Twas the night of Thanksgiving and out of the house
* h# v E# {7 z2 h2 p8 ATiger Woods came a flyin', chased by his spouse.
0 r$ P4 G) n! VShe wielded a nine iron and wasn't too merry,- J, ?% X( t' x- \
Cause a bimbo’s phone number was in his Blackberry.0 B* u1 }* A' R: s; t7 e
He’d been cheatin' on Elin, and the story progressed.
: O, ]* |8 z. O. M. V: T4 A" A( r' F2 LWoman after woman stepped up and confessed.
; P4 }7 y3 v0 V8 B. x) hHe’d been cheatin’ with Holly, and Jaimee, and Cori,; N* W' F* Z9 l+ y1 [
With Joselyn, and Kalika. The world had the story.2 I) y& \4 ^3 C" u
From the top of the Tour to the basement of blues,
" s8 |4 O( ^% x4 TTiger’s sad sordid tale was all over the news.. w! r; Y6 \9 u6 \% C
With hostesses, waitresses, he had lots of sex,
, n/ o& f1 F" CWhen not in their pants, he was sendin' them texts., }0 @' ^5 F3 [3 \; v, g- Q* j
Despite all his cryin’ and beggin' and pleadin',
9 J2 ^* b3 V3 Z. Z2 i* w- z; V) iTiger’s wife went investin' -- a new home in Sweden .( S+ S( y' N! X
And I heard her exclaim from her white Escalade,! r! i4 f5 J ~7 L9 F @$ |
"If you’re gettin' laid then I’m gettin' paid."/ p+ ]) @2 Y7 }5 ~& e
She’s not pouting, in fact, she is of jolly good cheer,) j1 o) Q6 p* v9 J2 H
Her prenup made Christmas come early this year. |
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