 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
& W7 o- i8 [' \' [6 V请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写0 o7 g7 K0 c) p- d/ ^
; C( v& T8 f4 S3 Z' Y$ W4 f6 ~1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
: Z8 M( p8 Z* }) t6 |1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫* K5 l$ o. I0 B7 K# u. T
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it" y& v. N: z( G/ W6 v% q
down.
# j: v# t' Y3 V$ jWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
4 a) p( F1 K1 ]$ _/ Ayou
3 L* V# u6 E9 H; t$ ^4 y, A$ Zleaving it down.5 j, S' l" H# I- L% R
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？$ u. H& ]+ W+ D& Y4 H- i7 b
+ R% d" k: N2 P7 ~6 o1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.! S( l+ d0 y ]! ~
Let it be.4 Q+ W5 J6 J1 K5 p. N
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去' d2 r" }5 F/ k- P9 y2 J
. ^9 d4 z2 r, d! Q) b% Z1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
9 B. J0 x$ L- O2 Q4 }that way.
" ~1 O' _* t0 X' A1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！9 i6 m, Y% H# Y. i0 n' {" F
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1. Crying is blackmail.
+ _) f% k8 |* ?3 I5 ~: H1，哭泣是敲诈+ P) s/ |. {" M+ F( C
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1. Ask for what you want.
2 V' x, y) U! f( KLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
; ~6 H- W. p# X6 eStrong hints do not work!( |# _+ J3 W% ^
Obvious hints do not work!
% T/ @/ X6 P* o! j# O- n, @# K* C1 x* \Just say it!
9 Q$ e# p9 l: B2 G# ~8 ~% @- F, l1，你想要什么就说- ]9 |2 _7 ^% b7 d1 e+ b! W
我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
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P+ [/ M$ U! m% [, n1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
# A7 `0 V: }6 L# K. }: cquestion./ _, G4 C- K- t! |& F U0 @/ a
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）0 D7 F7 s* c! M+ Z0 e) M6 j
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
. P3 @* I7 [& \( Xwhat we do.
$ z% B$ g5 k' \1 B5 L6 v1 W" OSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
& w; k7 p; ~' ]! b1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。" q5 t, L/ f7 x3 x' W
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.; K+ W% t2 u, I+ @6 d- L
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去0 p8 d8 k5 ?( O0 w; f1 }
: ~, ~& |1 K, r/ Z! A! R1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.8 T+ t" R& b5 i5 G% l
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.: b- [5 c' E, ]$ W9 n) T8 H# u
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了. @8 t! e, O+ Y- a9 {& {
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us2 N6 B9 B! L9 t4 R# O4 p4 I- G
to act like soap opera guys.& m7 m5 d) c% x1 X1 X' r% R
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们# S: w1 L1 v/ T/ v, ^
, A8 e Q0 E& b& [' J* P7 d1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
! E5 k9 R+ D4 H; Y1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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) m! z& L5 L* y" D: q1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways& \7 ~1 {. Q+ f, m8 P6 X" W
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.0 G! ^* f' Q; h K8 x5 ?) m6 P y
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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) ~; o( R, o" X1 {8 C h（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）
$ m& ?4 u; G; D# C1 R1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
5 l) l; C1 l, d* }0 s% O- pdone. Not both.2 H- w, }; o6 Z3 t4 I
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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- N; C5 c$ q- L- D4 j6 I! j1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during. V: f- D. L3 I
commercials.# m, W9 L; n! U) o7 j6 m5 M) ~4 S- K
; Q9 w2 l- Z; r4 x) w) t1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we." ~' A, ]( a: |# b g, A
- _6 L/ M/ I3 O" N1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.! U0 l7 f6 U4 j: {4 g, e$ A# s- `# \. ^
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.5 l3 e2 o: f' R, |' r* j
We have no idea what mauve is.. s7 {: f' |% W/ b: g1 T! D& c/ O
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.1 n' e7 r9 q" ?" w" }2 @
; ?- m4 F% w) b) m1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
3 v2 ]( e/ @; ~/ w& \nothing's wrong.9 X2 r" C% L( E0 |0 h
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.% j- \& Y% h. T" M/ V" y
2 b# N; ]1 h- |% n1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
# M4 N" i9 M% K* n/ V" D; l ryou don't want to hear.
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. x7 ]0 Z9 p* x' Q# ~8 k1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
; o: r) e9 k# f- E- I+ z lfine...Really.4 i7 Y( k% y" R! U: g
* h9 j/ e: J' H3 R0 x: o9 w1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
( m$ N) u* d7 W" N4 d+ K9 }discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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1. You have enough clothes.& C0 @; t5 E5 z0 F; d' C8 _# F
6 D/ ~ J& e1 f* @3 {6 I1. You have too many shoes.
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% M' F$ t9 G3 i! V" L d4 K4 l# |1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!) S9 n; M$ t5 Q0 m) t- y+ A
7 i3 m. a) ^$ g5 V, M% ^1 G9 m1. Thank you for reading this.5 z5 a4 }) _( w; D3 P4 ^4 O
! _: W/ o, A8 p% c' L* V& yYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
4 ?6 e* `4 J* fBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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6 r; ?5 G- f1 a8 J" @/ `Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
" S0 X8 l; N8 iPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
