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呼应海尼尼:一个男人的心声

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鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
7 M4 ~: t: I: F( N请注意,以下序号都是1不是误写7 p. d. N. ]$ t7 Z. I; m7 F
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.! z: n6 e, S% z8 N
1,男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it( e5 Z! J9 _7 I
down.3 m' }7 s9 K, f
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about 1 ?( d; t8 N" t1 ]
you# X, N  _. K* B5 a8 y2 U# H* C
leaving it down.+ E6 R) O1 z/ K* S2 O4 ~
1,学会使用马桶盖,你是个大姑娘了,马桶盖要是翻起来了,你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来,你们需要放下去,你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去?
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% q* ?* M9 {4 L9 S  D: @% t, F1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
# J' \5 c" O' ALet it be.' ?" {4 R; B7 \0 M/ H) E! K/ Q
1,周日的体育,无论它像满月还是潮汐,随他去
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
1 |% g  q+ h# b2 A! Tthat way.; `  F6 U9 E2 Y* X
1,购物不是体育。不,也别指望我们能那么想!
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1. Crying is blackmail.. D9 T: G* Q& i5 N/ ^
1,哭泣是敲诈9 F8 W% C/ Y% F% o  P  V4 P# B! _

  u( [9 q6 d  ^5 t& o1. Ask for what you want.5 E. y8 Q7 f! r3 X9 u
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
- v& u8 p+ n. |7 DStrong hints do not work!5 Q8 P) W9 C$ s/ A1 _" U
Obvious hints do not work!* s7 R% e+ N" `1 q  M
Just say it!
2 U- S5 D/ h! L) G' L: ~4 R/ G9 _1,你想要什么就说5 a; s: h2 B2 P
我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!
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8 s$ R3 x) U# [; W. c1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every ( U4 {1 C3 Z8 p; H
question.2 i" C  p/ L) q9 K- [# ]7 R9 o
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 (意思是,丈夫仅仅说是,不是,妻子不满意)& w* w  f- |2 }3 c

/ i& E) V8 ~9 e* S# H9 {1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it.  That's; h8 ~8 S8 d5 O6 G6 P/ I1 j
what we do.! a0 R3 F1 v8 N) m3 K
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.) Y4 e" O- O0 _/ z9 h+ h
1,如果你有麻烦,可以来找我们帮助解决,可是不要仅仅为了获取同情,那是你们女朋友的责任。
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/ k/ Y0 a$ ]. i) b1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.  See a doctor.  R& |' D# v) b# p" ]: x% H
1,你要是头疼了17个月,那你应该看医生去7 J, H+ Q: g$ x1 V& N
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.* A4 s1 j9 x$ c% }5 A, q7 m
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.2 H* o3 y4 C; y
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及,事实上,我们说的话7天后就作废了
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us; a  x0 j) C8 _# j" E
to act like soap opera guys.
! U7 y+ h- B  P. r# c' Y1,如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密(性感品牌)的女孩子们,那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
7 v/ R' V* A, x3 ]1,你要是觉得你胖,那你八成就胖,别问我们
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: \& |7 I+ C( e1 Q1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways! H' R6 ?7 L$ f; r# I# l7 Z+ Q
makes you sad or angry, we meant  the other one.& Q% o/ H: A6 u
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思,而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒,那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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2 h" K7 X9 r2 g" U  L(谁有工夫继续一下,谢谢)9 X! D0 L* |1 n8 O+ @
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it4 G, s) X! a8 g+ y, g) T' l
done. Not both.
2 Q' W. R- O" x/ q: p5 D* lIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
8 R: E5 K/ N9 X' D4 k+ L3 j
7 y, `9 k2 r5 r, C7 l1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during, `: f  L1 v0 w, Y3 ^4 K
commercials.
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.4 P  x( M& ]2 }$ j5 d; p- B9 l
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
! a  j  v( N5 E, J! J( \+ P$ a; k. oWe have no idea what mauve is.
- _; i  }: p# |! `( W( ^
5 ^9 {4 D. s" J1 D- d' l& c- f1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like, q$ c; |& q3 I; j  d* j9 u8 g
nothing's wrong.! G0 b: _* d7 \: k" q; Z6 Q- _
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
  K4 K/ n6 z7 @: C# k  Yyou don't want to hear.6 \# i! h! r* m; Q1 B* \4 ?
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
- G5 Z) P/ d; Ufine...Really.% `' H4 l, ]! C* i0 Z
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
/ ^7 ^2 [' Q: n. \& Fdiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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1. You have enough clothes." S6 L' A3 W8 i5 g& P" s  B
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1. You have too many shoes.
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7 W& O9 h( ~0 [& P( u6 p1 [4 x1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!
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1. Thank you for reading this.$ x' X7 W$ F# Q

1 A0 j, D* R0 zYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;- A; ^, y3 @  c0 b" d: R- F& i+ B
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
8 c$ W3 r6 d0 b- O  cPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:06 | 显示全部楼层
funny
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:10 | 显示全部楼层
试试哈。
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1.You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want itdone. Not both.If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.你或者让我们去做事情或者告诉我们你想怎么做,但是千万别同时要求我们。你如果知道怎么样做最好,那么自己个儿做吧。/ S1 V7 V7 H5 O, w3 ?( G! s
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
0 O6 v# R/ W  B& y  _/ Q: Y# u. }我们和克里斯托福。哥伦布一样不需要指导!
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$ {* \; q1 S! }* P1 P7 l1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is.7 p5 f4 ]9 h; J! M
所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。# Z: g+ S3 @0 c( H# Q3 F7 y

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1 }/ J6 N5 ^5 u1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
! C" _/ q, g+ c' K* V如果痒了就挠挠,我们就爱做实事。0 j4 r! t: f5 O- ?
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act likenothing's wrong.We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.0 D+ Z4 t6 l7 S* S
如果我们问发生什么事了?你说没事,那就没事啊。我们知道你们在撒谎,可是那根本不值得讨论。: w, }( }8 m% i7 l1 e

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  ?5 w% y0 h2 m$ A1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answeryou don't want to hear.
* l' E; `6 d$ ~0 i3 o+ @如果你一定要问一个你不想知道答案的问题,那么就别指望能听到你想要听的答案。
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 04:10 PM:
( D& V7 x! O) D- J6 @) @; _ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is.
5 Z( S8 _* |9 E8 x. Z所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。
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这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置, p0 O# g4 O* `- _9 i+ i- T& y
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还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Isfine...Really.% u& ~, f4 q9 M9 M8 ]3 g; v
如果我们要去哪里,你无论穿什么都绝对很好。。。真的不骗你
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' l# U% G, x# X3 i7 Y1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared todiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
  ~! b& O# q9 A& a; J: N不要问我们在关心什么,除非你已经可以讨论诸如棒球、橄榄球或高尔夫等话题。; I$ Z5 V+ K' s

% b0 T$ A3 o! t& O, Y& d1. You have enough clothes.
  X3 f8 F; q4 H你的衣服足够多了# [9 }8 C+ c! s* K* R, R. z
+ l4 D" d9 |7 @$ A
1. You have too many shoes.  Z0 x* `7 U: H1 l/ F: I1 Z
你的鞋子也太多了吧
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3 w2 z' s- J5 r8 e& k6 b. M+ }1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!
* D0 f. @1 Q2 \) G( d我很有型啊,你能说球型不是一种型吗?
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1. Thank you for reading this.
* ~/ s  {8 r9 \( n) P! U0 |0 ~4 z多谢你能看完这个
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4 a9 V- j/ ?+ @  T: M, I4 lYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.( b/ e) l( B, n7 K8 S% J
我知道今晚我得睡沙发了,但你知道吗,男人们一点儿都不会介意这个的,不就是野营嘛。
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:28 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 三思 at 2005-11-11 04:26 PM:+ \5 p& A. o3 @" V8 N/ M

/ Z( W2 s* r( `; s  w这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置
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; \& o& ]/ b% V. L- k0 e& j还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!
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6 R2 |2 u3 E1 f" |/ i1 Q4 b0 A3 e2 f应该说还是海妮妮心眼实,办好事。嘿嘿' }" i: ]! ?; F# B# o
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玩玩,献丑了哈
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:35 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
最后一句真绝阿
鲜花(1394) 鸡蛋(16)
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 03:26 PM:& h4 L, v3 g# G- N$ f/ j/ z
1. You have enough clothes.
9 v& L4 s/ T3 K% @你的衣服足够多了
( p& o1 u: ?  [1 Z0 y& k1 B2 n, |6 z  z% F2 x
1. You have too many shoes.
) s* c8 X) `8 \你的鞋子也太多了吧

3 A6 M% k& j' k7 c8 n这两句话我经常对LD说,但是她说NO。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 17:26 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 17:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?! Q+ P0 T* X7 e6 `* J: v" Q
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----这句话我劳工常说,我就。。。。忍了。尤其看《幸存者〉的时候,电话都不接。但是观看期间他可以跟我说话,不许我说
鲜花(10) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 20:39 | 显示全部楼层
1. Ask for what you want.
" F- g$ G: B4 e5 B" j8 C- GLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!% k5 |' y9 u# c7 R9 u# M" j
Strong hints do not work!
# S0 N$ c& j+ c. z$ \Obvious hints do not work!
3 U" H, {: ]/ ]Just say it!
6 q+ B/ g/ T. E' S2 J1,你想要什么就说
1 v% t, u+ `' ?! j/ R我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!
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关于这一条,我老公只认准了一条hint,只要我在晚上洗了澡,头发湿淋淋的下楼和他说话,他就坚决认为我是在暗示他炒饭了!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 21:29 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 蓝海 at 2005-11-11 09:39 PM:( Z" Z6 }. }7 Z0 V- |
1. Ask for what you want.
0 N1 l) [! q/ U+ @. @* c" KLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!7 z+ M1 G. E4 n* ^
Strong hints do not work!% [# V# ]% z, Y, ]0 c+ K! }
Obvious hints do not work!/ h, r6 l! C" m* C$ x
Just say it!
2 }2 J1 n* W& A6 N1,你想要什么就说1 I7 d; A4 W0 z5 h( A* C) j& d: y
我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管 ...
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9 H' u3 H8 [6 P3 O. k瓦赛
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 00:49 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 09:33 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 01:49 AM:
9 S* T' L1 M$ H5 s) K; f1 A9 G9 U被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????
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咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿6 C2 s3 S0 ?$ u4 `% j
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http://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 15:59 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-14 09:33:6 H' u6 H+ T+ u' k7 w0 ^' N! K' r
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咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿
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$ k; ^2 f3 N0 k4 }5 xhttp://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1
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这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。  ^/ H! m* o4 j% g

3 ]5 F) u" c6 H( s% L0 ^还想问问你的体会呢!
大型搬家
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 16:21 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 04:59 PM:
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4 y$ p2 ]0 u3 r
7 @: H/ [( ?' W0 A3 t这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。, S& T; i+ X$ `1 U) H
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还想问问你的体会呢!

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体会?; u2 s: g: y- y: f" F( c
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