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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA( n0 G4 p1 Y) p. |
% L/ D4 @* D( e4 r8 L/ t1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math.
# S1 x5 ?4 w& e& _% G. U+ ~2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
) s) \0 r- Y0 R# b) x8 v2 m3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations.
/ l1 B$ M) ~2 L& M4 {: @. g8 Q! ^4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on. , w8 {# d! S! C0 f% l
5. Weed
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA
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1. Big rock between you and B.C.
7 ?1 F4 n* a L3 E5 ?2. Ottawa who?( q3 Y0 x0 ] W5 o: a& u) w
3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country. $ w4 U( j9 o" _: x. k i* b
4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of.
2 q$ r: a+ h; ?" `! H5 F! d5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country.
I: H" y" n5 P) f$ t6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups.
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N6 V# y& F$ ^1 O; G6 ATOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN
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+ O0 [8 ?8 q; X% t1 T. e* X! K1. You never run out of wheat.
1 o- B& u- f% y+ x6 S! r2. Your province is really easy to draw.
* c" w$ T. X' T1 k6 T7 W3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours. 0 j; u) w( g/ l( D3 ]
4. People will assume you live on a farm.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA
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; k- h/ ]$ j* r1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property. 4 h1 x: _: V4 q+ {, k9 D/ L% X
2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes.
3 v6 n" n5 e5 f8 D/ ]0 G3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter.
; a' z* g" ^! W1 |9 l9 K4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood. 9 f {$ D" e) o( r2 H
5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by. 9 Z9 o; H2 S" N' B
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0 r7 V6 N* @4 [9 V. O& QTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO
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4 P7 P2 Q3 |% K1 N. Z1. You live in the centre of the universe.
( {) j1 l! T, G) I8 \ `2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump. * T% P6 v g9 l; f0 h
3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.
4 I/ z) A+ B4 G4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime. 4 H! c' `% m5 F' y
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" q9 \1 h* B: Y+ cTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC
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- j& k* `$ Y' h, U) [1. Racism is socially acceptable
* }3 ~9 {! M+ e$ z+ s) L6 `2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next. ( I/ }( y2 `# }
3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada. # V P Y* @* [" c
4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *
& I! b5 |2 i' i4 pTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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6 Y$ C& W; V8 L2 @TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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- W4 Z. }# M O7 M1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income.
7 [2 X+ B* W' a0 K& k8 U; f2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies.
9 k7 Z/ y: B+ r5 z3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick
1 \1 k0 _' I6 n6 W3 r9 M4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse.
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9 _' l) R% M" ~ X1 o4 C/ [$ {9 rTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA 2 w/ H& j" H1 ?) o4 I
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, Y4 Z1 X9 x3 n3 L T1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can. % P: v1 o' V4 \ B! N# G4 b
2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt.
7 Q0 {7 w8 s }7 q: _3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money. + Q, W6 H z. W) l! y
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
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# Q1 e! M, `5 G1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge. % a0 A5 P% z8 O
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour. 4 z3 u! u% z* ]
3. You can drive across the province in two minutes.
% e8 h6 g0 k8 Z T4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea." 7 @# T$ E; ~' J; u+ T$ m: x1 R
5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from.
/ m, G; g b) A! q; X; Y6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.
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% a7 r- C; N( _. W) BTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND 7 L' m8 G/ U3 L2 j4 r% D4 g
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1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
. z) w, D& E! [, t8 M% U! q) E4 F2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse.
1 y- K9 X4 O4 k' X0 L7 B1 i5 m3. The workday is about two hours long.
' s! `0 B) D9 X) ^9 p* a4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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