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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA) E0 `/ R- t; C2 U' ?1 e6 C$ g
/ V. r# Y0 }# g. A9 A1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math.
* x' a1 L6 d% K* R3 V/ |2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
! x- m N# X H% s3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations. Y$ I5 s! ]5 K
4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on. - w. m4 F+ s4 e6 T8 t, r
5. Weed ! ]1 I% p- E, F# C) k( Z1 T' L
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA
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1. Big rock between you and B.C. / n) h+ m% Q6 u' R( ?7 v3 `: c! U
2. Ottawa who?
4 l- `9 y' C4 ?( F7 ?. O% T2 P Z* r3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country. , G) T. h* ^( w" ^
4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of. ; j) ^& {: Z. \: m% x% p0 E6 U. `
5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country.
/ q3 h+ E) G( K! u9 c9 ?9 Q6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups.
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+ |& V5 s5 K3 ~3 S! \; {! ATOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN
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" U' Q# w, E8 e% o4 q4 D, l, I1. You never run out of wheat. " A4 s" T0 j/ D: V8 ^
2. Your province is really easy to draw.
) Y- ~! L5 i7 q4 I3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.
, O, ~8 h4 H3 u3 z1 ~& P4. People will assume you live on a farm.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA
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$ @9 x+ v/ L5 `! I1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property. , X' `# ~) N3 p0 X) F: X/ _7 U
2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes. ; h9 b) ?6 {* v
3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter.
4 I z* X1 d+ |1 @( l' o4 M1 U$ {4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood.
, [# @8 u1 b1 |7 ?' C$ H) U7 h5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.
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* I8 v9 D3 p1 w& d S+ DTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO " _1 B x0 `/ `
! S. p1 _! ~" p7 }* k9 m- {1. You live in the centre of the universe.
7 q4 r y+ _' T2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump. ( J; O. h. r8 q3 d* L# c
3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.
& z" h; s1 z1 T$ G4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.
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" f; t0 C& y: B9 [1 ITOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC
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V( D6 |- `' D' k/ _* x1 |6 G1. Racism is socially acceptable
' P, L2 G) N. u; P6 }# V( X2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next. ' V7 a5 k, f8 R
3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada.
% S( y: u) e( U4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *
2 ]0 Y: x% e7 a* RTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK ' m+ b* x( S. C5 U# a( n) s X* L
! t- V) Z2 l7 n$ M ^. ETOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income.
( [3 s) n2 }: l. q2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies.
$ R: J q; a) ~0 a3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick 4 j: u/ v8 S A: K }7 e
4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse. , ]: u2 S) v8 R. \5 L
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA
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1 y5 M7 t# j3 W' U& o1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.
0 ]9 f: O4 U+ b5 T. M+ J: t7 z2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt.
( h0 i7 I; _% N/ y, {9 I8 G3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money. - {# Q# }: K |6 Y- K7 [
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
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# i& |4 _' p9 S/ D. m1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge. 2 f o- N; L8 G# z, S1 K' }
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour.
; }" O1 {; X; b a* Q9 C4 ]3. You can drive across the province in two minutes. , ^1 o: u4 n; j: J7 h
4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea."
$ B& X$ i- q/ F- F& ^( N5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from.
! C) n6 V; C9 Q! \" n$ _3 v6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.
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2 A% K- U- N% @/ Y$ x% GTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND * Q) Q w# Y; u# J8 x: E2 y
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1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea. ( C9 e6 r% Z1 S
2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse. ! ?8 Q- l u; M; _! C
3. The workday is about two hours long.
( ~0 J% K: s. i' m4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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