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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA
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7 P' L& u- i3 Q# @1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math. 5 s1 o; L, w8 F9 X5 r% o8 H2 m
2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown. * ?3 K7 r( X* D+ p4 d! n, d
3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations.
% a) Q3 Q: C2 p6 K/ |) v, a0 i4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on. , k; l! A, J2 F( [& h6 D
5. Weed % G3 T6 R( }- x1 V) h% z# B$ ~
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA , c* c; R7 N. T2 @) [) `5 I2 H1 o
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1. Big rock between you and B.C. : Y' M5 P/ ?$ v+ P
2. Ottawa who?
6 h- @ [1 P8 v9 H% p3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country. 3 l' i3 j- O- ]: A: C0 A1 G
4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of.
1 ?3 w5 J# V& Y3 ? @9 K& E5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country.
2 l6 P/ ?$ v9 B$ b# F6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups. : V7 \4 _7 R) ~' p4 ^
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN
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9 D- X& @$ d; j1 Y4 ]1 H! f$ W1. You never run out of wheat.
4 L- ]6 a+ Z5 u n |& t, P2. Your province is really easy to draw. 6 [# S* }$ H. Q7 S+ n: S
3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours. ! k7 ~& g" i- v' e' b
4. People will assume you live on a farm. " }; q @! f. ~& x, x7 x( o
+ i, `/ Q4 i7 L0 L" I9 TTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA
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! e) T# J+ o, }1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property. ?) R: m# L& p
2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes.
- O4 k3 ?' K$ r0 E0 q2 \# G& X' l3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter.
1 {& {" z( h7 ]. ~+ t4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood.
3 j0 L0 K! d# B; V5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by. ' I( y1 P0 k- {- Y: P% Q
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7 C: O/ V2 S, FTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO . {3 s% ?: m6 |* P2 o/ |
( W+ t: Z/ ^8 u6 I0 o5 L8 B5 e1. You live in the centre of the universe. ) i8 n! o4 e d
2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.
$ c, O" |$ |4 Q3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election. - U; m* a$ }8 K) s0 V
4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC
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1. Racism is socially acceptable 7 |' D: A0 I |% I$ n7 [: J
2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next. / L' g ~2 f* N; v" N" n9 n* K
3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada. 9 Y9 a. X: R# i" B! N ?: f- f
4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *
# ^: s. w, v8 ~6 j0 F( w6 hTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK t* Z! |/ E2 S, k4 Q4 G$ j- e
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income. ; O p4 H6 M' N; `" D! h
2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies. $ L0 X2 T6 o+ O
3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick $ Q! C) p* S: A
4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA
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$ ?8 o( L0 r$ v0 g: i# N8 p% C1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.
8 b# f) Q5 N! N7 d3 K2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt. D3 i6 u3 S' M5 U$ C4 h
3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money. ; D5 ?2 a. U1 Q+ [" S
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
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1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge.
# g) i. M* V+ `+ U2. You can walk across the province in half an hour. * q3 g! v6 C4 V; z5 B6 G3 n+ F
3. You can drive across the province in two minutes.
5 u& [: r9 r# ~1 N) g# k0 G* G: I) g+ A4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea."
/ R0 d% U6 t& N" X: L/ ?+ j# J4 M5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from. 2 k1 P; F! f( h/ ?( w0 T; z8 `
6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night. % l4 A' W: A" E" n0 Q9 G
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" }! V( ]; X* p1 C5 j1 I+ b" ?TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND
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1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
& @7 d$ y N: C2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse.
8 }! W' s! L9 | ~# l3 r3. The workday is about two hours long. - u7 D6 L1 y, S6 m- p7 D
4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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