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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA
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\# r: B# H8 @- G8 U1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math.
2 l1 X; t( s2 t' q0 ]% E X2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
* C @; D3 S1 w3 w3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations.
; T) b& L% X; g- Z" ?4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on. j7 H7 T/ B9 l; l
5. Weed
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; L0 u3 {9 u7 x0 j2 |$ c4 kTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA : i. }1 l) i/ q& ^. }# q- P( ^
4 D# W* ]- K- R1. Big rock between you and B.C. " {! s) N3 }# S8 P+ |
2. Ottawa who?
7 |4 C. d- K. N1 V: |3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country. 1 n3 A. i6 Y) ^7 G' p% _4 |# y2 x
4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of.
! K8 k7 ~1 [( w% C) O5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country. % n9 N- C" e1 e' P7 ^
6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups. 8 b7 v \: u" [" E( T
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN 7 p: v+ g0 v0 V2 S( g, |9 e
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1. You never run out of wheat. 2 S) U- M _+ }# l8 E& }" j: p
2. Your province is really easy to draw.
5 H% ~3 d: u$ @4 y6 ~3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.
: `! x1 r1 `( j4. People will assume you live on a farm.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA
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' @3 G5 y7 c' H& C. q) W1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property. 5 ~. y8 G7 d' I0 i& g
2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes.
* B1 Y1 f) U; k' A- v3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter. 8 M$ Z- F, q/ s
4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood.
( P4 w0 t8 a' h/ y6 u1 w5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.
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0 n0 F8 Y7 r2 F7 \! H( JTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO
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% C6 G5 {& }* |1. You live in the centre of the universe. ! G2 m5 l: H" }2 q, J! B
2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump. 2 K2 j5 @) D I/ \) h
3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election. 1 r& @3 @2 f0 q8 K. ]% ]: \' k
4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC
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1. Racism is socially acceptable 9 U* l. S( o7 |. S
2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next.
+ O6 b; k3 _; T X( ^6 p3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada.
3 A* u; B l y# z+ y0 H4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *% J' T2 I$ {/ k' D: j/ z
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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' A, L8 H' @* p- w9 u6 iTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK + H8 H5 N0 \5 Z+ n/ V3 X
) \' [4 S- a; [( r5 x& w7 [, L/ @& c1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income. 6 V N- Z4 P4 P: N+ e
2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies. 8 t* Q( e" P: I5 t) {, _
3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick 6 i: r8 \1 \, g" K% J# \! |6 L# l
4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA
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+ C6 ~" C2 j3 @2 V7 ]1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can. * i, X+ C& y: I" m/ _7 b: l6 {
2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt. " |: f- L( F4 n
3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money. 6 x, v1 C5 D4 d$ X5 v
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7 e. ?6 n* x4 R4 T, u4 eTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
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7 G3 m. m1 ]+ O( r1 b: X3 H& ?1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge. : B$ m+ E# A6 m' v; u8 Z, A# ^
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour.
- @4 W/ C- S5 H# i- v; C3. You can drive across the province in two minutes. / \% F1 z$ C+ A0 d1 {5 _
4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea." # h4 Z& @+ m- O# ^% m
5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from. + d& k. w+ d3 l8 i$ `
6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night. % Y- l& l5 y+ G: Q" ~
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND
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1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea. ! {) c5 B% g9 X+ v; P; a
2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse. $ o6 w6 W8 E' K
3. The workday is about two hours long.
) Y$ F% ^3 d6 @! C% w, _ D4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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