  鲜花( 1394)   鸡蛋( 16)  
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& Z4 S3 q2 d$ W- p( C4 _- xWhy did God make mothers? 
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is. 
8 T1 h) v, E5 o1 y% d2. Mostly to clean the house.  
) y& _' ]( d7 p# ?3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. ' Z" C1 a2 s# }. P  g 
 
- G) A% M- j* X' H% V# PHow did God make mothers?  
& K! [. e' F- ]! X% E1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us. 
5 B$ t1 ?, ?5 w1 U# Y7 @7 y* b+ }2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. 2 k# y2 P1 N- c+ G/ o. L 
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. " g4 L* q" b* ^) ?8 } 
 
& k. S" |) P# i' r" q' Y+ |What ingredients are mothers made of ? : ^/ j2 j& U) T6 [ 
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.  
* c. V8 W7 a  Z4 y) u4 v2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. " a% _8 f1 w; k' G 
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Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?  
9 o& w% J. K! q, R% r. j1 v1. We're related. 
" V$ V) C6 ?; b4 ^2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.  
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% ^0 a' v4 n, o$ n$ S8 U4 M; nWhat kind of little girl was your mom? 5 `. u6 B& [  k" o0 ~4 w 
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. * E% H  [0 q9 h. s7 }. V 
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.  
, n/ F1 L% b8 Y* R$ W; T/ }3. They say she used to be nice.  
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" l% e5 z' Y; L4 f& h. y* k+ b9 P4 _What did mom need to know about dad before she married him? / w2 e: q6 H: f% {' \0 F) g 
1. His last name.0 H5 E( G) A1 K- {, \ 
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer? 
; c' Y7 d( u4 S$ O; F3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? % C. U* w+ g# b, C 
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Why did your mom marry your dad?  
" s6 J) ^; k8 q0 [- Q5 y% j1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.  
; o# S. g6 g% A) o7 U2. She got too old to do anything else with him. : v; X# z1 B0 e- K6 r 
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. 5 I9 M# g+ B" v/ h+ O. ?& c/ X 
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Who's the boss at your house?  
1 v% j+ K! U# Y1 V1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.  
% n% L4 A5 `' y/ r/ \! g2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.& a; p1 _& N- G6 ?( n: D 
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. % D$ X, @4 X7 n. A# S0 ^1 g 
 
% z% z+ h6 T& K' y( AWhat's the difference between moms & dads? ' `! K7 r- k8 p 
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.  
* i8 [- y- y) ~% N3 L2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.9 ~* R+ j. G1 ^  u* q 
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.  
7 O' o. D! @. m5 b5 ]3 z4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. , R& a) o9 L1 K 
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What does your mom do in her spare time?  
) L: x. Q6 F# Y* J; U0 l( p1 }1. Mothers don't do spare time.* u) W  u5 `" u* z4 D 
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. " x% R% W  [& k% y 
 
- l$ V/ S, u" \7 x6 g( ]0 IWhat would it take to make your mom perfect?  
1 o% a1 P6 w2 g% d0 c, O" n1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.3 \  j& e' a. _ 
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.  
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? $ M$ Q8 J$ T! e0 m2 g 
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. 1 X+ X( X& s4 L. b0 ?$ u& x7 J4 w 
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me. 
/ y8 j0 t* |1 R/ b9 ?3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.  
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