 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : 6 Z h- P, y, Y* k. p
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9 W0 m$ |+ g4 c `3 v- H2 w. gTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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* V6 q1 J1 g% Z& N7 C8 @- JWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. & }/ C' n& K- n# v7 G
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.0 h% R) _& r; {) ?( i
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- ; N- P2 Y& Q: ?8 o, r/ X0 ?
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. ' j, m2 U) E& {* ?% ]4 f
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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1 Q* ~9 b2 l, X( o" w" K2 cCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..& h& O( f5 O7 S
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 5 b% ~) h5 H! X. F) ?: W1 y
0 U; r& R2 U0 oRinse conditioner off hair.
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- w: X9 j7 v6 J- N& M N6 j5 u$ oShave armpits and legs.
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8 z5 s- m2 v# U8 NTurn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.& q, ? N6 H" \9 Q, ~
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Spray mold spots with Tilex. 9 G- K8 d! s6 ^ l7 W
) G! {, ?( x+ W' |6 s5 ]3 jGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. & O& d; ~; P9 @, R- i
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. Y Z1 N0 ]% W9 u O
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, m( @' `% @" a9 NHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: . t0 H. U; S G# d5 L2 K- [
" b- ~, f7 b8 XTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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Walk naked to the bathroom.0 o& p4 N y) u5 k$ j' q
( L! S, D/ c) v# x6 gIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
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9 ~# H6 H2 L+ E- P+ l) s, f! x1 u GAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. . [$ V/ ~5 y# f- u0 }
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. , S( C; J/ @, ?* w. b+ E
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. ; M" _, `+ @1 r! x* I! q. G# B: Q
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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8 l% Y- n9 @) fSpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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8 X- W; n" _/ O/ Y* \0 h3 nWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. ]! u( } ]7 A- n! F) C! @
0 f S+ C# D. g1 h$ AWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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& i3 r; b4 a6 R/ JPee.
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Rinse off and get out of shower. ; x. }) Y D3 @# ]& p8 a
& d. Q* u% B3 @. j$ nPartially dry off.
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$ \' {: ?" ?5 }, L A6 |Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. ; }) W/ w( M3 k0 i: H$ H* }
9 [" u3 r$ P5 d+ r6 e9 V. t) TAdmire wiener size in mirror again. `$ ^! H9 [8 S* a0 v' k' Y
) ]/ j N% c |& Z. W* iLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. ' ^1 @' J' B' @$ @3 G: T
5 d6 G2 Z8 h# `' j1 L2 HReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. # R6 j+ M. e8 C0 }2 L, l5 B1 w
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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