 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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3 A4 `7 S/ T# h0 ~+ r& i; Q5 WWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. + }4 i* M, A# e. @- S
+ [! X6 l# _. e: Z3 m$ h* C0 jIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror --
2 h; T% F4 z. M$ \, K8 emake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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+ _" f3 v p. I! j/ y# \6 U8 xWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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' \9 U3 B w" d6 U8 aCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..% `2 {" ^) y8 e! k+ k
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 5 [) |" L6 o% H( a
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Rinse conditioner off hair.( j9 i9 [! W" H
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Shave armpits and legs.. T A, r" y! c" ~3 p) _ w _
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Turn off shower.
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/ l4 B" L' s1 j, F6 k" e& SSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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8 ^- V" R9 d9 f+ {2 e- WSpray mold spots with Tilex.
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; E" }. q8 @; Z* ^) J( P! cGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. 7 S8 T: E: ~" ]" r
4 }6 Y- L* g# W& P" z+ ]! u' U. L( ZWrap hair in super absorbent towel. * ], ~( H( q- L3 g3 @+ q! k, q5 q
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. 6 J5 T! M# r" Q) o7 f6 k4 D$ E
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. % z0 y" A6 }0 E. ~. ~
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: 8 q5 g8 x6 U6 F3 {. w
! i- c: p7 ?( T9 ]. y, @Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. ! J' I* a4 J; O
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Walk naked to the bathroom.
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6 C; H5 p/ h: N3 v0 jIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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! p7 @0 u$ m0 J, l: h, K$ ZLook at your manly physique in the mirror.
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( P- `+ s. C! \; uAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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9 v# J0 w) j5 l ^9 t V! dGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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( W1 U; T; i! A! p8 ~- L; r8 mBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. " d8 s- U1 c8 W, m! B- a
& l& a5 I4 A' x3 B3 W' j! N2 cSpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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0 g* q- ]2 V8 y# MWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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7 h0 P$ k' U, u( PWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. 6 O! C$ f% M- \; |
n0 b- q- ~7 o# N3 f+ qPee.
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5 b5 t, @% I/ R. e+ _4 |Rinse off and get out of shower. _( [1 {5 ~. @- c6 Z
0 ?" Y) {# y" KPartially dry off.
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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Admire wiener size in mirror again.
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0 Y. D4 F+ H. `5 _, x( }Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. Y- M2 J6 w- ^# y9 w7 M# k
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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+ K. f& e+ {3 }+ k$ I% |2 @ bThrow wet towel on bed. ! j9 i$ W- n0 J( K0 r* C S
1 E2 s) }: E/ I8 QIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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