 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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- @ ?# K; ]% _1 n' aWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. " d! G! J5 L1 E4 u0 }
& ^; p3 @6 [0 vIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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) T7 X" D2 z3 z# ~Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- z: F/ }) f( Y( G; @: X
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.& v7 x$ F2 v J: Z( I
; N2 v4 ?7 `2 F, @3 V) u. ^Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. + I# L! R9 q7 Z! b1 E( o# P$ R
5 }( O- h! h2 _( IWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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8 Y3 T1 S- h# FWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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( J, T, A3 p' }9 t7 L" Z3 X0 R* UCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. $ z6 T" F& I4 }- }+ W5 C! ^
( l. ^6 |* t, o6 ]& h& o q- YWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. , ? O' Z7 j6 k$ u) }. T" @* |
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Rinse conditioner off hair.
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* I( r* C+ v, F( w7 ]3 IShave armpits and legs.- p7 h- O) L T- A
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Turn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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Spray mold spots with Tilex. m. P7 t. V' A8 y* J+ l y
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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9 c$ u& `9 \ P/ t1 @4 N9 kWrap hair in super absorbent towel. 8 b1 z o$ N( u. u3 R$ r# J
* D1 Y3 n# Z3 I6 J vReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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# N6 {$ {5 {( x$ @HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: ' Z1 m, U2 S, N; I
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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Walk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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, k! W& A! l& C& ?7 uLook at your manly physique in the mirror.
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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" a* X) z1 n5 W& eBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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+ L$ J4 |7 w9 W0 Y* q3 `# s! V4 ^Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. 1 H( J( |8 V8 U# a* |, Q) J' @3 \& c
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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5 \, r p4 t- H: _# ?, qWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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4 m* l/ N4 ]$ W5 G' a/ o; DRinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. 7 z7 {& p$ N8 U0 }* V
4 a' K) ^+ u% c8 D/ IAdmire wiener size in mirror again. 4 l# ?. U/ r3 r, W3 [2 }
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. # }: w; W/ a8 c% f' F! K2 O5 J3 h
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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