English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?

Let's face it
English is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
! E8 t8 y' L3 f5 N4 F7 T. vNo ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.
( t" K6 D) P' K+ Q$ w8 J) S: o
We sometimes take English for granted
( u0 ?" \8 Z- S) D% ABut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
1 y0 g: i- v" GBoxing rings are square
# ?4 k2 a; d; k( R2 _* ^And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
; i! s9 \0 z0 W, y. m, b0 gIf the teacher taught,
( N3 d4 {& O  ^  W0 G$ @Why didn't the preacher praught.
% k) B! ]/ A( g1 J% `: \& |
9 ], b0 z) o" V0 \If a vegetarian eats vegetables
7 g- z+ n$ y  ^" aWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways
* Y9 M7 r2 q+ c8 v$ d7 Y# X4 h
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
/ p2 G; \5 ]: I8 @& V8 pIt burns down
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
6 `( |3 a$ S4 C2 y
/ c$ ?! O' h! `8 [) @$ C$ lEnglish was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
$ |: Y' V. w, B. P% B
That is why
0 }" B+ `; [7 x. UWhen the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
% X7 ^8 E8 j1 R/ t* DAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
/ n+ w. C6 w% L/ [; M1 u  p/ J& r9 WBut when I wind up this observation,
It ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
1 |2 Y! c+ H4 |$ Z2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
; S, I* }( b7 p3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
& k5 B" n! G% I$ I3 p8 v4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
) S+ Q( T' Y& w( w" l/ Q7 [, C: b其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
我看了几行,就看不下去了.
: a% t5 {' |5 m3 f7 Y1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

5 O1 S) P5 P7 g+ N$ b3 ~2 N" r0 X谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
8 W, {; @, r" @- W5 T$ j/ b: d$ Q实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

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