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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.- }8 ^7 P8 @5 \8 v4 M
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.6 M! d$ M/ P( j9 s) a, V
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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6 @" b: x6 X1 E7 I: f$ P! yI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:3 u5 |+ D. v' p% H/ v9 M3 I2 u  }

8 A/ _8 _: u/ R& }% ~4 V" J: n"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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- }, K( @7 o, v" jI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?9 J% j) Z2 q' `6 ~6 M4 b5 M# B( O

' x* H: A) M8 U2 `- r( Q/ M# N2 eAnd the second one was:
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4 z* o4 @( C$ X& H4 i  X"What's the 2nd Amendment?"( _7 B! x- V# E8 g

$ X% f3 m$ T9 I4 T* Z. k; \% zI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?5 i; O4 t) g! C9 ]/ n
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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( _, R. \3 V- U  X. ^% _6 DI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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9 e1 }) a0 w- _6 p$ h6 ~I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."1 X" K- b; T3 @: T; _8 L) o  S/ W
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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; t+ _8 |- e3 Q9 M4 ~Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”* f: c4 A4 I, H7 L

0 k( _* }  A- G8 `7 t  z% ?This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!
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4 b/ `% p  R/ a4 ]Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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; t( d' C2 _/ |( \3 `  [4 P) W1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.& f/ o4 z2 o$ O

: [1 N$ p7 g: @4 x6 X"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.  {+ _" g, J# I7 U9 b# K( w" b( `
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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: a7 o/ b5 x1 pRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.; |* o6 p2 v4 }4 |* b* r  a
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
" n$ ~, i/ B7 s- @5 |# d; p- Ea young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
) {* |6 ~+ c7 l/ |% X& d怎么理解?* K" A2 N$ h: k* N' x
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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) d; T5 D& {0 d+ V7 |不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
$ N* w  n' g( L" s9 F  o) g怎么理解?
$ m9 q( b( Q. |6 V# q; f50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
8 \! ^. a* z' `2 ~3 K+ k! }cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
8# 朝阳 5 e& S  ~2 k: y3 m- C2 z
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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