 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.- }8 ^7 P8 @5 \8 v4 M
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.6 M! d$ M/ P( j9 s) a, V
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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6 @" b: x6 X1 E7 I: f$ P! yI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:3 u5 |+ D. v' p% H/ v9 M3 I2 u }
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- }, K( @7 o, v" jI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?9 J% j) Z2 q' `6 ~6 M4 b5 M# B( O
' x* H: A) M8 U2 `- r( Q/ M# N2 eAnd the second one was:
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4 z* o4 @( C$ X& H4 i X"What's the 2nd Amendment?"( _7 B! x- V# E8 g
$ X% f3 m$ T9 I4 T* Z. k; \% zI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?5 i; O4 t) g! C9 ]/ n
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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( _, R. \3 V- U X. ^% _6 DI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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9 e1 }) a0 w- _6 p$ h6 ~I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."1 X" K- b; T3 @: T; _8 L) o S/ W
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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; t+ _8 |- e3 Q9 M4 ~Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”* f: c4 A4 I, H7 L
0 k( _* } A- G8 `7 t z% ?This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!
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4 b/ `% p R/ a4 ]Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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; t( d' C2 _/ |( \3 ` [4 P) W1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.& f/ o4 z2 o$ O
: [1 N$ p7 g: @4 x6 X"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion. {+ _" g, J# I7 U9 b# K( w" b( `
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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: a7 o/ b5 x1 pRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.; |* o6 p2 v4 }4 |* b* r a
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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