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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.+ O9 C2 D7 I" }& ]

3 L! Z+ i9 _% @% mI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.+ l; {  k* g- e: t% D* G
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"4 k: F8 {# h5 ?( o

: V' k: N# s! s9 n" w; T) W( CI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"  [1 R1 T) c9 H, u6 w5 A

( X3 d. e$ U" c0 S- M  N2 O/ ]I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?3 m  A* M" K# N0 `% M% r. |; {

& q( y- z* E$ q( [6 ?"What is Roe vs. Wade?"( h% R9 k; A' j- }

) C) n3 G3 h' k1 L3 }* nI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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* W  A0 Q. }( Y) K5 C# v  w" }I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!! c6 D0 D6 y5 B0 t" y6 g* j/ F
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen.", z' a9 v8 r; W9 f2 n8 ?: `

/ [# Y5 t2 m( C$ w  mSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"3 F) k/ [% _0 g

9 G* x8 ]1 y% u9 ]Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”" ?4 n/ k5 `0 Z" F0 ^: I; l
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.2 A4 ~2 O0 Q% r7 a3 R& P; D
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Thank you very much!  M& Z: Q5 Y# U5 v; i; R
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+ l: O' q3 S. [/ J# I* A; ^Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:" y/ J. i6 P$ }  e9 c* \3 D) H+ f
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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% Z  H2 p/ a& |. u: h& ~2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.2 C1 b4 a# ^1 s' w

6 ]" o7 M: _: t& H0 Y; lJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.; w1 a: U: T! E7 u) ~$ R6 [. k

( S9 ?% x8 O  FThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
3 e, C' s) b% W+ W+ J5 da young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
大型搬家
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
7 [/ H/ y- Q6 ^" E怎么理解?
8 t  B& S2 G( L50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
6# cyz0116
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8 d$ a: {3 n+ R, X' j不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。, _, P( d- [% [, g) |- P* Q
怎么理解?! _4 c% y& p) G' }, l
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?# a2 x! d9 `3 i. W
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
大型搬家
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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