 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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1 u% Q* S# A! [ Y8 O" ~( FI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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: o- x: r2 O8 l. o. o9 VI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.. d. c z4 ^/ m# G3 z3 }
3 p6 V% ~9 \) ~3 K! PI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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% a3 N) t' H" T6 Z% B6 Y# D( @& ]"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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( k5 q2 k. G- G& `; TAnd the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"& l$ x5 Z+ Y3 L1 l/ L
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"5 X& r& y3 C' A- X
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?/ z1 `# |/ q7 p* R" P
8 e+ [0 S, ` k5 |I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."* U* Z! ~: U @ p0 j
# A( Q+ M4 {! }/ H) f ~" m6 D1 MSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.* n) q* o4 t4 I4 }& D0 Y
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Thank you very much!' t: I# Y1 m+ D- A8 a
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:8 s: |+ b& A) G1 l4 O/ |5 ^: }
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.6 c+ U( @6 r. d4 s( m+ l$ {
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.) c$ e6 c7 T' R* M/ X
7 r) i C3 ]* p8 f: y9 R"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion. W: z! x5 |4 Q, d5 m6 e" T
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".9 f2 `, ?& \/ l% Z
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.7 N4 l' V1 W W" h5 r- a
% I+ c S! e. B1 T( L* c% BThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
