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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.6 J% F' I7 r( x- ^
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.0 Q9 z" Q5 E9 F, T

% T. r) k7 D" c9 ZI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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7 K. k6 @5 \7 P5 H  w6 f7 |! iI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"2 B" z% t- x; L  N0 f- @
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?2 [* J3 Y5 R* Y4 }8 D
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And the second one was:
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2 u: @( I! n8 x8 ~5 K1 J"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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6 Q% O2 _/ F+ {I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"- m% K+ ]' T7 X- y; w; f! p# ]

# K: ]) @( A  f8 ~2 ZI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?+ e& L8 S3 H7 K, A* p! j0 [9 g
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!$ i& d* C0 G" L2 e  B- V

( n1 B  z$ S+ rI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen.". k/ V0 _. i  _8 |! X( H
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"( x% e3 v- p+ o

3 B) G* P" T* ?; WNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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7 v- j$ s+ I' w: @This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!
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# D7 U/ [+ m' m9 y7 O6 Z3 O0 ^Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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. p' m: R4 d4 r1 Q2 W3 d1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.5 L6 m& [* _5 Q% I
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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+ T% |% W/ n  o0 m) [Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".4 _  Z8 y0 t5 m9 A% ]& _
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.* o/ ?% b  E) p1 u

( D/ R9 D3 [2 I% O3 x; ]The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
5 `  {& _9 c* B% D' x$ o1 |* T) b. {a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。0 D  u  `$ ?# i1 o; A! S6 R" F5 s
怎么理解?
1 l) e( w- t! r1 s+ b# R* y& X  {7 E50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116 ( ^7 f6 _; A2 v% r7 p! U& `$ f

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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。2 M, ~- F4 }8 P7 _3 i7 b! k2 ~( q
怎么理解?7 [7 ~0 ^$ _1 h& A
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
( l" c4 T3 L+ p+ P+ D: ?1 ycyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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