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Tiger s Holiday Poem
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Twas the night of Thanksgiving and out of the house
$ E3 y0 a0 H: ?& }$ o* _Tiger Woods came a flyin', chased by his spouse.9 G7 d8 I- E) q7 u" [
She wielded a nine iron and wasn't too merry,4 i- w3 {) n# e( l5 `) S' ?" j7 {
Cause a bimbo’s phone number was in his Blackberry.
: U' R$ m! a E+ r, U& Y T3 oHe’d been cheatin' on Elin, and the story progressed., M, N' |! W- F c) W& t6 ]7 Z% o
Woman after woman stepped up and confessed.
8 p% D) w4 W9 ^6 R0 `He’d been cheatin’ with Holly, and Jaimee, and Cori,% a& S* N' d2 a$ c, x
With Joselyn, and Kalika. The world had the story.
6 Q. b8 p5 C# SFrom the top of the Tour to the basement of blues,. n l. G& ?8 l& V+ ^- A
Tiger’s sad sordid tale was all over the news.5 X I5 \3 J4 g/ u( |; y
With hostesses, waitresses, he had lots of sex,6 z: r0 P7 H7 s' x' V3 X" y9 p
When not in their pants, he was sendin' them texts.
4 F0 h/ ~4 W/ K: @; D4 qDespite all his cryin’ and beggin' and pleadin',+ L! g& m6 | y0 q3 e; t; c. R: o
Tiger’s wife went investin' -- a new home in Sweden .
$ X2 [3 i( f- {$ eAnd I heard her exclaim from her white Escalade,5 u. [& K" Y$ t
"If you’re gettin' laid then I’m gettin' paid."' ^$ y% a) G! ?4 e3 F
She’s not pouting, in fact, she is of jolly good cheer,
: H& O9 K; @+ k2 o/ N7 AHer prenup made Christmas come early this year. |
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