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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush3 u( m C- S2 v. k
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday4 ^ z1 i2 a$ _6 Z8 t( d
morning.' k) l# U5 u4 N- Y
( a9 Q! d2 O! \, b, A* | H) a1 w3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
: n3 J% {9 ^$ o. o. x, Syou are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
# Y* S, n( P) r+ ^landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.) k" U* }# _. T, y* U3 C
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its7 \4 a1 ~/ F, h9 e$ S" p
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest7 f5 S! y( D1 L, G
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires* @ g3 \/ q: M* G0 e2 U
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
/ _: q; ?) v0 B6 _+ N! I4 l: {phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
" o; @% }8 w Q/ r$ Z% mcussed out, and possibly shot.
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
F% Q; {' h' b3 wget you shot.. K1 s A `4 _ ?3 {
: x7 Y5 ^7 X+ V, L7 B# r4 t# O7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
3 i, ^( u# \& G2 e9 ehas turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
9 g- \( v) B3 U8 i5 _+ Jthe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot) n- K7 i r: J' {! I
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first! t9 K7 o& Z, o' v8 {! c6 ?* a
vehicle through the intersection.
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8 h! o* c, ~: P& s" `. I% N6 H8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
# H: t( o5 y: e, w' jbarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
9 ]7 F, x7 d& uday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and$ H4 F& [# p2 S2 J
more construction starts everyday.+ ^. b4 Y3 q" V9 `" ^; p8 ]7 q
8 s0 K7 h7 _4 I2 k+ h9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,: i$ c, H U: Z0 l
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,! b4 b1 A' F3 s- ?; R9 _
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
7 b s6 P% k9 U; R# a2 z7 j: e* H% N% Wroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
+ D7 X" n; F* V$ M) I9 GRoad are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and7 r4 F+ Z' z H
66 Street are also the same road; got it?0 X! O% `; i+ C: X% m' J% O% l1 b: [
/ }1 }" n: M: N11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the( L) a' P, A- t1 X1 z- M
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
9 S2 \& i- i0 Y9 @Activated.'
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,) x! X6 @: F1 h% T! |; a/ h' y% \
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'0 i% c! @3 @: l7 _6 J: o* N& M5 A
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot. E# F0 u5 F. [+ n/ V
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur" c+ ]9 G* D, Y( ]. ?1 X" [
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and6 G3 U( F- X( z% S9 [# ], [& m
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
