 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
: R' o k+ w# d2 P2 e# d请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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2 C0 P1 k) C+ y4 W2 Q1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.' y8 R1 s# p4 `) T" r* k
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫+ W/ D3 [7 T% [; A
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
) G6 K6 Y, F( O, r7 ~down.
$ ~1 N) `) V2 C9 _& G# JWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
4 ?, R* w# v0 d3 [8 Yyou
7 m2 d( K9 G) ^; F0 f+ jleaving it down.' S4 g& z2 k- o
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
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5 w0 p6 S6 S' {- z1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.5 ?. P7 P2 N/ v- k R- c* R" x0 Q
Let it be.+ W! i a' S8 z! Z# v
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去. @- e' Q! Z9 K V# {& Y2 @
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it' X' U2 i N, E0 |" d. i5 j2 O' S
that way.
: L7 K- b4 ?5 ]! o& q1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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- n' V) N, q; B; ?7 f- k1. Crying is blackmail., O, @) z' Y& T* M2 |$ |8 I
1，哭泣是敲诈
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- }7 J+ W5 y ^. T3 k1. Ask for what you want.
. z, Y0 ?" g8 D m' x: QLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
' T1 |' M2 m0 L6 v3 M# |# x% q) ZStrong hints do not work!5 r3 S0 W& ?+ _! f7 D! _
Obvious hints do not work!+ ]" E$ |. L* ^6 t, `) A' V
Just say it!# E/ R2 T2 s0 I; u+ B
1，你想要什么就说
: E& n. u. P" @/ F3 c$ K' |我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！' y( D0 Q" x5 ?5 T4 y
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every / e, @: V, A% A1 H. |7 l& C
question.
, ~/ n- u# _5 b5 a8 Y9 I1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
9 q8 r' C& k3 [( H* h0 Dwhat we do.
( P' v# l( X( ]Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
2 n; X+ }. a: Y4 v1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。# k# z f! }. ?' R. E! X
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
2 ^7 d4 d4 E$ a8 M1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
1 B: q, \: m P. m9 N9 `In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
; j1 s+ W c. t( _% {" b$ B" X9 a我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us( N7 l+ @ M D( x1 r" M
to act like soap opera guys.# h9 c) S$ N2 c
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们4 r3 G! [/ ~) ^6 X
" l9 L9 J0 y, Q6 E! r* E1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
6 Q' `+ g7 [$ h$ {) u! v7 C. F1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们/ I# j3 A5 G6 \ D8 `
( x; i7 t( V& T1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
. s: ^( w* Q9 f w: q' l2 zmakes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.; j8 ?" @# p; q8 u5 N. @
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。! ?9 z% z5 w9 N# K4 D6 k
; i1 b2 R6 |* q6 V+ h* v9 C# C（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）' W: |4 [7 k$ p: ~) y, T' M; L
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
: F, ?6 j3 G' _& x+ o" I/ zdone. Not both.
5 V- [9 ~) X( y0 Q) m W! D- _! PIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during+ g+ T* t# J7 X& t9 d' H% ?
commercials.9 X3 p9 w- k5 z2 h/ f
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
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$ o) U1 _8 f7 X0 g% D1 Q/ d2 I5 ~1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
1 @( l+ @! z2 l- F; \( u& APeach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.% }4 n0 b7 n6 o% q6 {1 @# Y
We have no idea what mauve is.
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( p9 C5 r% p) t1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.4 n9 o d Z8 N, ]0 P
I2 C$ c# r9 q0 ^0 k5 \+ p1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
% ?* Z+ z/ j, Lnothing's wrong.
' C: K1 C( k" w' A/ v' RWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.! D; V$ M$ g+ w8 c9 i% O% Z
' p* L T' Q: @) g1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer9 Q; b, x1 |" A( C
you don't want to hear.& {# ?: I0 b3 q( K |9 U
6 q2 l4 g0 P- C( Y' k* P5 v4 C1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is6 a' Q6 R/ ]3 Z5 \& [
fine...Really./ i; k& [$ c ^. u. g; m* M# M. s
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
& _& u8 \- U7 C3 ~0 } ^7 b: [discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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+ x! f6 w1 D! y1. You have enough clothes.! | Z. o' S* t! V
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1. You have too many shoes.; J; N* k% G( c: ^" p+ r4 S3 s# m
! v+ R" {$ Z3 O0 T: i" Q0 ?: z3 C3 @) B1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!9 a2 L" [; m/ h# S6 u8 u
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1. Thank you for reading this.
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! z( W! h; [+ V) xYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;' M5 A/ ?6 j- Z% _- Y
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.8 V7 i) m; X# g2 W+ s( z
# R7 R* s2 v* G) Y( zPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
1 A8 U! Y. i4 p& v" dPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
