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呼应海尼尼:一个男人的心声

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鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!+ V( a3 U1 r: k) W9 F. H6 w* j; S
请注意,以下序号都是1不是误写2 U9 L" }& ?  y0 [( S; N$ x9 I

4 C7 s. P: e  [1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
4 [# m" q( W$ v$ B3 i1,男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
2 h2 t* |- M: j
( M8 g2 Q5 U4 p! `9 R) T, X1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it4 s- v4 y; B2 n* B8 R) r7 x
down.
$ c. _/ C) c% c  @. S3 u& |' ?" bWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
6 n5 k) k; P. q( [$ G1 ^5 Oyou) o3 c3 i/ W# N! _7 I
leaving it down.7 X" m% S- o8 m$ D9 l4 W  F/ M. I
1,学会使用马桶盖,你是个大姑娘了,马桶盖要是翻起来了,你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来,你们需要放下去,你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去?
- L) k! j0 _* s1 l2 e/ \6 r8 E+ C! L' W' I+ u# L+ z; M' R
1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
; ^) }  r, u: P3 L" f4 Y( u2 OLet it be.
  e: o5 c! t7 j- x1,周日的体育,无论它像满月还是潮汐,随他去7 P& w9 z" z# C/ V6 U+ p1 Z
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
' \& C' o4 }. x. f7 j0 P/ ]that way.
' K* d  U1 p  z+ r/ u2 Y1,购物不是体育。不,也别指望我们能那么想!
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* w" ]6 r! p0 i* [% V4 t3 m1. Crying is blackmail.( o1 q  t# R! s3 K$ C8 r$ x
1,哭泣是敲诈* o* o9 I1 E1 X) c" R
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1. Ask for what you want.( S  V) E6 e$ L# }
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!; o  K$ N/ r- G. F6 k/ B( A2 n( l
Strong hints do not work!+ w* k0 E$ d& Z/ w# I: ~1 D3 g
Obvious hints do not work!. \0 U6 R+ c) l7 l
Just say it!
- ]5 J( e5 L( k/ M% h6 T& F1,你想要什么就说$ e8 G9 y0 T! V' R; O
我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!: B5 X' T! x+ t3 l3 p

# e. I  w1 G6 Q3 ~  d; \  z1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
% S* h" t' G' j( ?5 oquestion.! i# r# t- [+ u. ^4 @3 L( x
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 (意思是,丈夫仅仅说是,不是,妻子不满意)
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it.  That's
5 [+ x4 q: v4 H: jwhat we do.
% Z8 j4 _9 W( ]8 \% x$ }1 rSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
' e2 \6 ~3 R  k& t1,如果你有麻烦,可以来找我们帮助解决,可是不要仅仅为了获取同情,那是你们女朋友的责任。
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( @* R- f% C' y  ]1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.  See a doctor.
+ l; A: l' e+ }  S1,你要是头疼了17个月,那你应该看医生去1 Q) F; ~8 H+ _& H7 W# N5 L

& D' P* W1 j% @1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument." i8 B# }* T" U. }5 J
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.# @9 U) M  x1 ~
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及,事实上,我们说的话7天后就作废了
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
7 {5 f  u( @' m& z' [3 q, Zto act like soap opera guys.3 F; w  v6 E) {  {
1,如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密(性感品牌)的女孩子们,那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们+ ^( B3 }  K/ b9 z3 |$ a- c) A

4 _$ Q  @* h1 @, K1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.) n: H) s. }$ t. q0 Y% V
1,你要是觉得你胖,那你八成就胖,别问我们3 w+ ?& G+ J' M0 C; _: `' C& b

7 u0 ?1 v. ?0 x$ G: U/ Q( `6 d1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways  F0 \( y3 S- [# T5 y0 M! ^
makes you sad or angry, we meant  the other one.% |4 h( \7 y0 w+ \
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思,而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒,那么我们本来是另一种意思。3 O9 Q. S3 E7 x5 l

; n6 o! H+ @+ ]" Y' @& _. Y# Q(谁有工夫继续一下,谢谢)- O6 a: t- c, ]' B
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
) B" R" H9 k2 q$ u! k. X. B9 M) Gdone. Not both." b, a. D$ W) p+ D' j# M4 b9 S
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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7 a) b2 }2 t( Y  P6 N) ?1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
- y- K. z1 k6 B! W! }. i) Bcommercials.
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
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" G# S8 e, y0 W4 {+ s  ?: k; W1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
! P( c# Y9 U) KPeach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
: O0 T# j- P( X& {) i. j/ x8 X" tWe have no idea what mauve is.- A' P7 r( W/ ]2 M
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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9 l" _, _9 _. D5 U0 x/ Q4 q1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like) w! k& Z0 w/ v# t
nothing's wrong.: z# u- |% e) W$ {7 @5 a! q
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.* b1 T1 U; Q: N- n

5 A# @' J; r# u9 ]' a, N1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
- A2 D9 o# Q. myou don't want to hear.
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! R6 Q1 S3 L( u& R1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
  j$ y* q3 R$ n! e! jfine...Really.8 t5 Q4 V$ m9 K  d3 a: t+ Q

) V* G3 G7 i6 r; a) [: \1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to  K6 a* v2 j; u* ^' k
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.. J9 k9 q! r' u% G
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1. You have enough clothes.
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. k: m. o' V3 Q: q' M+ }1. You have too many shoes.
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1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!
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2 \0 g) i6 h/ p1. Thank you for reading this.$ C1 O# s2 [1 O$ D* K( }; F! F
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;6 P4 I+ K+ H5 Y8 l" A/ N
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
0 h3 u6 W/ ~* n8 P$ O$ H4 [) @2 pPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:06 | 显示全部楼层
funny
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:10 | 显示全部楼层
试试哈。
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1.You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want itdone. Not both.If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.你或者让我们去做事情或者告诉我们你想怎么做,但是千万别同时要求我们。你如果知道怎么样做最好,那么自己个儿做吧。6 t! _% w) u+ c
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?* ^# B0 U5 ~( {" h8 p; ?
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.* z* L: [* E! m# w1 Q" W
我们和克里斯托福。哥伦布一样不需要指导!
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is.3 ]  G: }# F. P( M: U8 D
所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
6 d* Z  A; K. s0 A  i# U如果痒了就挠挠,我们就爱做实事。
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act likenothing's wrong.We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
2 L+ e$ N8 K8 ~* G3 b! D如果我们问发生什么事了?你说没事,那就没事啊。我们知道你们在撒谎,可是那根本不值得讨论。
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# w% g) N- p5 y; [1 Q  R1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answeryou don't want to hear.& b) G2 m6 N& R" O! F
如果你一定要问一个你不想知道答案的问题,那么就别指望能听到你想要听的答案。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 04:10 PM:0 \; p& A2 W' a) v
ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is.
; f% K8 I9 d: h2 b/ \  @$ A所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。" _( t  C% j+ \* @" }

- J1 J& V) \- J# e这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置
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还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Isfine...Really.
/ B6 D  \$ R5 {9 ~2 E6 V4 m: s如果我们要去哪里,你无论穿什么都绝对很好。。。真的不骗你' R1 _4 ?. r+ H; q% \0 Y2 n5 I3 z7 E

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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared todiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
8 s+ K& `5 N+ _" S; ?不要问我们在关心什么,除非你已经可以讨论诸如棒球、橄榄球或高尔夫等话题。$ T) }) g( e& |' t9 U: m4 E9 k5 M

9 q, G6 v, i+ _1. You have enough clothes.
* g5 A' a6 W6 k你的衣服足够多了" h& J; u# T5 R# U% d* ^- `! c- p

# G2 D5 O6 E" p! g. Z/ n$ i1. You have too many shoes.
" ~! W# @' {# F# W4 u你的鞋子也太多了吧9 K2 i! g* F! z. G9 X

, _! i5 M1 u) b% @) w' I$ J5 L% D1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!
6 V9 q! ~% [4 u+ x9 o9 Q' F6 ?  O我很有型啊,你能说球型不是一种型吗?) T$ x% I3 u8 [" A4 E* d5 Y
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1. Thank you for reading this., y6 [9 G8 g6 E: E2 G5 K" i
多谢你能看完这个
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
, Z! h# {) g3 b% v6 c, k) Z我知道今晚我得睡沙发了,但你知道吗,男人们一点儿都不会介意这个的,不就是野营嘛。
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:28 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 三思 at 2005-11-11 04:26 PM:9 g. ]8 f, W9 s, x+ K: T; q

# O0 K' h0 ~4 b这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置
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还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!
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  l& Q( j1 r9 u应该说还是海妮妮心眼实,办好事。嘿嘿
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玩玩,献丑了哈
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:35 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
最后一句真绝阿
鲜花(1394) 鸡蛋(16)
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 03:26 PM:
6 p( r$ D2 O( N+ O. T1. You have enough clothes.
3 R8 c# k; z2 P7 V你的衣服足够多了
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1. You have too many shoes.8 H$ @( C! O! o- }4 E. w
你的鞋子也太多了吧
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这两句话我经常对LD说,但是她说NO。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 17:26 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 17:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?
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- M5 |  T; I2 E: p3 g7 S----这句话我劳工常说,我就。。。。忍了。尤其看《幸存者〉的时候,电话都不接。但是观看期间他可以跟我说话,不许我说
大型搬家
鲜花(10) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 20:39 | 显示全部楼层
1. Ask for what you want.1 b8 {  K/ }8 R0 D$ H) G0 ^
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
8 Y% O. J6 U4 W# E  EStrong hints do not work!
) V" z! r" Q6 o- U6 W; {" ?! kObvious hints do not work!
* N2 p) |" ?0 D" i7 kJust say it!6 p- u* `  o+ X- J$ S+ T# A
1,你想要什么就说9 {1 J( X8 O9 O& ~
我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!
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, w/ ]/ G9 b% E6 K8 L! ^关于这一条,我老公只认准了一条hint,只要我在晚上洗了澡,头发湿淋淋的下楼和他说话,他就坚决认为我是在暗示他炒饭了!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 21:29 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 蓝海 at 2005-11-11 09:39 PM:
; k$ X) @: K" `1. Ask for what you want.% K$ d2 `8 A) |  b. [
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!& D5 c- x1 O# U
Strong hints do not work!
/ J  w9 ~* C1 y* m3 XObvious hints do not work!3 [& \/ Y: Q& `% b, e( G
Just say it!
, Z, D; m" I2 q. O& k1,你想要什么就说
8 Z4 Q- r' j6 I' ^7 X8 X* H$ W! |% J我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管 ...

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瓦赛
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 00:49 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 09:33 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 01:49 AM:. p8 W5 P2 F6 W! T8 b( l
被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????
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咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿8 T. `* M7 z" u

9 l8 {- Z0 q. G5 \5 S  E! Khttp://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 15:59 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-14 09:33:1 d0 j- @- A5 @+ b4 A; G6 R" Y
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咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿
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3 v2 \; ~( o+ c( A$ Yhttp://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1

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这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。0 X3 [, t: B2 a8 y

& `5 Y, T- l5 j0 h7 h9 c还想问问你的体会呢!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 16:21 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 04:59 PM:
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这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。
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" N. D: K: H* ?+ _3 @; Z还想问问你的体会呢!

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体会?
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! y' j) i1 t0 R回答到那个帖子下面了
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