 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!. [7 q; b. i4 ?1 x9 c& [# Y+ l/ P
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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6 G+ N* X) l. |$ g& Q1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.; u5 V8 z, ^8 ^4 q/ y' y! U
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫6 U$ T% D7 `; J/ V1 [; a: L
. x o% s0 V* l; E8 f; }; ]. [1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
. h2 D0 H. d9 t" Cdown.
" \ u" c: l% H/ XWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about 7 o2 H* z+ A6 I, W+ y
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leaving it down.6 U8 k' ^' i9 F
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？' U4 n6 ?. u; P, F" L) R
* D ^! e' v2 R+ B1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
o9 R2 @" S+ y$ o9 pLet it be.
: ^# g; \# k: m9 A1 L0 m6 X/ t1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去' n0 _' M+ i! E9 ~, N- q
- Y R6 ]5 ?* m: M1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
& x2 u2 J# U2 G1 d4 W# l$ z4 Gthat way.2 Z4 S. L% H! J) T: L, u- k/ r% s9 V
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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1. Crying is blackmail.+ i& O" w* A) m7 z2 Z
1，哭泣是敲诈
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8 ?6 e* D8 t5 v. R# O1. Ask for what you want.! k+ I) P0 \$ ~( S( y5 b" O% x) W
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
* W2 ]( M9 m4 ^; I5 E# C- X* d6 ]3 CStrong hints do not work!
; \, T* K( ~7 T0 Z4 I- p/ w% ^Obvious hints do not work!7 L0 V3 M, Z6 U2 r2 ~8 O& k
Just say it!: e5 ]- p- y7 n, h) n$ \2 E
1，你想要什么就说$ u o5 y. Y4 Z H% Z
我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！, w& v- m( E G! }0 f6 [/ H
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every $ H' O1 w, `" M+ }3 N/ c
question.7 R7 n f' y5 p' W
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）" q# i+ y Q2 k4 _. J
- \; J: V/ f5 a, ]1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
( I" b& ^, d- G1 j2 awhat we do.
. V& F4 x$ P) `& pSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.5 C- A; N* p- y0 V" I, q4 V' ^
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。: {0 @8 V$ M& o
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
8 X9 A" o& k1 X" e0 T1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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& M7 s- S& Y" _5 l- f; E$ J6 p1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. i5 Z. q9 x! ?% U- z, t+ B6 Y
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.; o' c* S1 }7 H7 |, I
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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* h$ C) i9 z$ J' R; y; B" a! {1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
+ x: ?4 _4 ^5 f1 A7 x; Fto act like soap opera guys.8 V# E' m: y8 s) G+ t: d4 p
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们3 }, X0 h/ c4 c) l+ G
, Y9 Q) t; K0 J" ]* M$ ~2 N8 m1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
/ {: P8 y$ S( r) V3 g" e1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways3 w- v9 n4 w1 c' ]
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.3 h, `( B; Y3 N+ x. f$ t" w
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。) u0 O% m) C B @! [
' H, ?0 K5 L( O+ Y, f（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）) k' @+ R% x' t, |
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it7 t1 C1 L0 i% i/ O+ l" N4 A
done. Not both.0 o- G! }* u1 {3 D# @
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during- E. v# `& j; @4 }. z3 ]7 L
commercials.) ~( Q7 b4 Y" ]' ^! c: n% W h% {
7 ^0 G6 g/ ?1 K9 ?9 q1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.- @( J: v7 |% h3 f
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.$ S% M/ h: N0 p/ o% q# K) E* b
We have no idea what mauve is.* x/ ]3 b( E8 \ d( \
% j& u0 G4 u0 i1 q; ~6 h1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.* j- R+ `9 G% L$ N" Z# X
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like2 X) J1 V# f W3 c6 `1 k$ K& D( c$ S1 V
nothing's wrong.
1 Y$ d" j- h- n0 [We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.5 r) ^- R$ n: X! C0 ^- }
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
u3 R5 l. C7 U9 M; P4 Z) Iyou don't want to hear.
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' R6 _: s5 n/ s7 i2 w0 n3 t$ p" M1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is8 \% ` E$ M& m6 e8 b, |
fine...Really.0 Y- ~+ R5 Q( ^- ~+ g$ x3 m* N
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to) B8 [+ [5 G% Q( k3 c
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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5 K2 |, u: t; y/ s6 @/ n1. You have enough clothes.' G+ |5 V- t+ P; {/ A& @7 b( d
5 V' |& }* P1 Z* B8 u) v1. You have too many shoes.
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!) l+ s. w0 M7 H) @ F4 F
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1. Thank you for reading this.
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. y( R3 O. a. b! p9 jYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
- }% B+ M& |2 r5 Q2 ABut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.0 H) h3 S! B) j5 W1 W) \
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Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.3 g5 P( [4 C; c |
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
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发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
