 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!1 D! X/ ^3 a$ I; R
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
) h8 \1 g1 C5 [. {! j1 i1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫3 \0 w) u" g5 S8 i$ v, ? J9 U
3 V* b6 |" r7 M' m1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it Q) u6 b# }8 K9 W( G3 u
down.
0 D6 N0 ]7 U5 ]6 Y8 f; y' XWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
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leaving it down.9 F2 F2 d0 {" ]# }2 p
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？/ @9 L$ K# ~5 n" r9 [* w
2 p+ {/ q0 D% k1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
/ j7 H ?5 P# k: B6 YLet it be.
8 w. n( b* w( W* D5 v5 g2 s4 r: `4 M1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去' |$ V( }9 e% ^6 A
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
7 z5 U* @% {/ Ethat way.
2 j3 q S# H E1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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1. Crying is blackmail.
6 V0 g1 M2 f. W7 Q1，哭泣是敲诈 g3 d- ^. o8 N2 W+ o& i& | f
! p; w5 ~; ?' a9 k4 J5 H1. Ask for what you want. o& u/ E# v Z1 S4 R, P! r
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
% H/ c1 Q6 c3 B5 g3 y' cStrong hints do not work!2 g/ n! F. f( q! {8 u, G X
Obvious hints do not work!0 Z. u1 ~9 J) i( O
Just say it!0 A3 f8 S/ ^/ b1 R
1，你想要什么就说
5 Q( }5 J( ~4 C4 I! Z我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every 0 r' W3 l1 T; j) O+ k
question.
" S$ ^" O [9 C. L+ x+ w3 x- s1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意） \! ?3 k0 F# W* s; f9 Q
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's9 \6 n3 Y& a: k" z( [) T
what we do.9 R! ~- g# X& _5 r
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
6 H4 L# H* Z! g1 l, o* R( C7 s9 X, v6 a1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。6 A0 j( x% H9 b4 |9 G- |
( R/ ?% ^) u& y1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.$ m6 Z. O: e, A
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
$ j5 w; o; E! gIn fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
( R2 N# ], `. G# {- v6 \. X t我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了$ z' {4 y$ }% S4 a1 m
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
* i/ ~$ ]0 X. k* ito act like soap opera guys.
9 R# u( o* J5 g8 E1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们6 n, Y9 N; e' B! G
- N) z* [5 P1 |' N( b" k1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
7 M+ q$ B: |6 I! U6 t1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们1 I& W) P6 P& [
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways! {6 g2 E+ T* Z, Q
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
. E" i6 z& c3 D4 B7 ?( z9 E1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。) Z2 b$ L) s3 V4 h- M) o! Z
* b3 [* `* v% a2 W9 L: D（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）
: ~4 g( P" `5 V4 U) R! U) T$ {; w' S1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
( s3 C0 _* C8 J# Sdone. Not both.3 q; v* u4 F* S) t% E
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.6 K7 E/ g6 n9 f2 Y
5 D, D$ n' S+ ]! n" i4 |1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during _1 s* H! i' Y7 P
commercials.
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* g# F: m: H) B2 W/ c% K- [1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.% Y% `9 S. x% |. ~8 \" U
. }2 x7 m/ B- Z8 j: }+ X: t1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
7 }) j# O3 ~, Y7 C! I+ `Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.0 k# q/ X& m# A8 ]! o/ G
We have no idea what mauve is.
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' X$ `: ~- W9 \ G/ T0 d3 @1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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& ^. N; B; T+ \3 b1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like$ A. N; T4 |; }# H& G( ~
nothing's wrong.2 v" J }, c2 v% N1 K! M; M% H
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.( a1 D" e' O! R+ A: x$ X
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
6 r& q0 [' M7 h$ Z6 q) Ryou don't want to hear.
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
" g5 ]4 ?" w0 E/ s. gfine...Really., |4 z5 z8 j1 @ u
7 G7 ~* {* a l1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to2 q: I3 l5 T3 |$ U: m
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.; [5 `8 B& X( M# [9 \: C( v
" {9 D9 g1 h8 [1 A) ?$ V9 ^1. You have enough clothes.7 y0 G/ I% ]2 G I% ^3 i5 s* ?8 e5 G, n4 r
) l4 V& m6 L f, i% {3 k0 {3 Q1. You have too many shoes.
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0 X$ G6 a" n) H& ~# P" \7 ?1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
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* b! J9 R! U7 {; \& S1. Thank you for reading this.
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
( y- k& Q; P! T4 D' k# M; WBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh./ n4 D" E- p8 {; J/ o
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
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发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
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