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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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1 @( d$ t2 A \6 y2 U1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.& j% M: f6 n* b
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush4 y2 Z; ^( ]7 d& i, C
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
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5 ^8 K/ G' x$ i3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,/ ~% C" D- o8 I8 r
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a, Q$ J V/ \$ H9 {6 {
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.% Q! p$ Z' ^9 h2 M& B$ ]$ I7 H0 v
! c7 C) G, V1 v/ I9 C1 l/ w4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
. K3 X" x, }* h. N, I; E3 G0 w9 j7 B, Cown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
# E" b, [. w( N2 xmuffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires4 i* N6 Q1 {9 I) V7 O9 l0 k9 n* d
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell& x, S4 V6 M1 y# W F4 Y. ?
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
8 d9 V2 u$ Y: y2 n: |; @cussed out, and possibly shot.9 I: o! v) n8 E9 x9 l$ q
, r7 J/ v# K9 H' M6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
) q4 l9 }! R l% @" p2 }" K* Jget you shot.
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8 |4 C# I7 E/ \5 q, X( R7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
6 Y5 [: \, E6 l$ Y8 @0 Uhas turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
% O$ Q0 D3 \/ Z- Tthe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
6 h3 K+ G: h$ Vyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
( U) ~! U5 D) g/ a& `vehicle through the intersection.
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour( w |: ^8 s/ w8 V' c
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next5 ^% R1 A3 v, a9 n
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and" {1 D5 z" H, v3 Q( `. v
more construction starts everyday.
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: v1 D! z T' V! |9 n6 D" G. A9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats, {- b; O: n0 h I* h8 O$ r& _
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
0 H8 M Q* d0 u8 Dsquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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6 u8 f4 q% C9 d. r9 |10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
6 Q$ e, X" B" A( a% vroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye9 X* g$ a3 c7 S5 U: s6 E! j% v
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
6 ~8 |4 A5 \) s, X& y$ \66 Street are also the same road; got it?" w+ c. i( M, n/ P+ Q' \
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
3 u' @, E8 j) F9 a0 V1 z% u( cshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally7 o& o7 ~8 w1 c/ ?+ r. e- p4 l
Activated.'
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+ u' {. X* j2 d: e+ T12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,# J# a6 r( ~; P3 z r: u/ Y
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
7 z7 x& D/ z! A) X, vaccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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. S, R* a' \, x13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur- }' G. P, {' K! p9 W
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
' m3 j1 f& z! I8 N9 Rblankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
